


what the hell do i know

by blurryfaced



Category: GOT7, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Attempts at humour, Epistolary, Genderfluid Character, Long-Distance Friendship, Non-binary character, Texting, Trans Male Character, almost guaranteed future relationships ngl, alternative universe, and i mean ridiculous, future polyamoury, multiple timezones that make my life a living hell holy shit, now that i think about it the first chapter is kinda boring but it gets better, original character(s) as background character(s), possibility for future relationships, ridiculous nicknames, there will be anti-jokes and just bad puns in general sO, university life and talk and all of that shit
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-12
Updated: 2017-07-17
Packaged: 2018-10-31 01:27:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 21,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10888941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blurryfaced/pseuds/blurryfaced
Summary: long-distance relationships are hard, but mark's willing to put in the effort.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i'm going to try and update this every friday, i promise. and i already have over 18K written and saved so it's only a matter of writing a little more every week so i can keep on track. it's also very relaxing to write and has some kind of plot to it?? or little plot points so it'll be easier to keep track of it as well. i hope you enjoy it as much as i do.
> 
> now, a few pointers:  
> 
> 
> * the messaging system they're using allows them to change their own names and change each others names where both parties can see (bc some like skype and kkt allow you to modify nicknames but only for you to see and not your friends but fuck that)
>   
> 
> * when a chat happens between two people from different timezones, the time represented in the messages will be of the person whose messages appear on the left side
>   
> 
> * when a group chat happens between people from different timezones, the time represented in the messages will be of the wherever the most people are from (for example: 3 people from the uk and 2 from korea, it'd be uk time)
> 
> where everyone's from i think gets explained at some point or another and if it doesn't seem very obvious i can always add a bullet point as to who is living where. and don't take anything i say in this for face value or to heart bc half the time i don't really know what i'm doing... hopefully this isn't too big an a/n?? but enjoy!!
> 
> —mack

**_11th february_ **

**_mtuan93_ ** **opened a new chat with** **_kimseokjin_1992_ ** **!**

**mtuan93 [11:12]**

hi! I was looking on plym uni’s facebook page and  
it listed you as one of the students to talk to  
about questions and things, or worries? I was  
hoping I’d be able to talk to you, thanks.

**kimseokjin_1992 [11:13]**

hello! i am indeed someone you can come to about  
any questions you have! and i’m free to talk, so what’s  
on your mind?

**mtuan93 [11:13]**

I was wondering about living in halls? and the sense of  
community it has? it seems really open about the charities  
and societies it has but I wanted to know how it compares  
to actually being there?

**kimseokjin_1992 [11:15]**

what it advertises! i didn’t notice too much  
of a difference when i came here, everyone’s always really  
open about anything you can ask. the roommates i had  
were pretty friendly and weren’t too bad, honestly, but  
i think it really depends on who you get paired with.  
some people are worse than others.  
i’ve never felt alone here, though, if that’s what you’re worrying  
about it’s pretty much . there’s always someone there for you  
no matter what.

**mtuan93 [11:17]**

that’s cool.  
what about societies? are they easy to get into?

**kimseokjin_1992 [11:17]**

they’re really easy to get into!! i don’t think anyone’s  
ever really been turned away from joining a society or  
starting their own. at least, not from what i know.  
are their any societies you’re interested in?

**mtuan93 [11:17]**

you wouldn’t happen to know anything about the lgbt+  
society, would you?

**kimseokjin_1992 [11:18]**

i do! it’s really accepting and i’ve been told that it’s  
actually bigger than a lot of people were thinking  
when they first came here, haha. there are  
a lot of people in it and just here in general  
so i’m pretty sure you’ll fit just in and find  
other people who you can complain to that’ll  
get you without a problem!

**mtuan93 [11:20]**

that’s good to know.  
um, how easy is it to make friends or get a job?

**kimseokjin_1992 [11:21]**

friends are really easy to make if you go to  
freshers week and just generally try and socialise.  
especially with other freshers, you’re all in the  
same boat so you’re all going to be friendless,  
probably, for a bit.  
you can always make friends with your roommates  
if you want. not everyone does. i did. and so far we’re  
still pretty close and i’m living with a few at the moment.  
as for jobs, there is a whole sector that dedicates  
itself to helping students get jobs, so if you can’t think  
of where to start, or if it looks like no-one is hiring,  
you can just head on down, give some details and they’ll  
figure out the rest for you!

**[11:22]**

it’s how i got the job i’ve had for the past few years.

**mtuan93 [11:23]**

and the city? are there shops and banks close to  
campus? is it easy to get around from place to place?

**kimseokjin_1992 [11:23]**

there are. some shops are more expensive than others  
because they’re sort of in the main shopping bit  
but generally you can find a good place closeby that has  
good prices, or after a month or so you learn short-cuts  
to further away places that have better deals and stuff.

**[11:24]**

the city has really good public transport, and it’s not  
super big either, so you can very easily walk everywhere  
and it doesn’t tire you out too much, but you still get  
exercise.  
the uni also has it’s own wellbeing centre building  
where you can go and relax if everything’s getting  
too stressful and to just let all that stress leak out.

**mtuan93 [11:25]**

thanks. sorry, that’s all I’ve got at the moment, I think  
I’ve been looking at uni stuff too much today, my brain  
feels dead.

**kimseokjin_1992 [11:25]**

haha, it’s no problem! making this decision is important  
so you should take your time and not rush.  
do you have many offers to look through?

**mtuan93 [11:25]**

I’ve only got plymouth and then two here in the states.

**kimseokjin_1992 [11:26]**

whoa, three offers! that’s not bad, honestly. do you have  
any that you prefer more?

**mtuan93 [11:26]**

not really.  
they’ve all got good reputation and they all mean moving  
a bit away from my home so it’s not like that’s even a factor,  
you know?

**kimseokjin_1992 [11:26]**

but even so, moving to a whole new country and continent,  
that’s a big thing. you should definitely think on that, and  
think about culture shock and the miles it’ll put between you  
and your family.  
i’m not saying don’t do it, just that it’s a big deal and you  
should definitely make sure that you’re not going to regret it.

**mtuan93 [11:27]**

honestly, that’s one of the things I’m kind of nervous about.  
do you have any tips to make my choice easier?

**kimseokjin_1992 [11:29]**

i’d say come and visit plymouth and england. come to the  
applicant day, but also give yourself time to look around the city  
and get used to the differences and custom changes so you can  
be sure on whether or not you think you could live here.  
because if you don’t and you decide to come here, then regret  
your decision not even a month in, then you’re going to end  
up having a very bad time.

**mtuan93 [11:30]**

thanks. this helped a lot.

**kimseokjin_1992 [11:30]**

no problem! i hope your decision making goes well!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_14th february_ **

**mtuan93 [02:48]**

so I may not be able to sleep.

**kimseokjin_1992 [02:48]**

if i’m honest, this is not the way i thought we’d start talking  
again, but hello.

**mtuan93 [02:50]**

hello.  
i just cleaned my room from top to bottom and changed my  
desk with my chest of drawers. my room looks weird but it’s  
clean now.

**kimseokjin_1992 [02:50]**

you just cleaned your room at  
what time is it in the morning for you?

**mtuan93 [02:50]**

almost three

**kimseokjin_1992 [02:51]**

almost three  
so you just cleaned your room at almost three o’clock  
in the morning on a tuesday.

**mtuan93 [02:51]**

can’t ignore that sweet motivation.

**kimseokjin_1992 [02:51]**

yeah, i can’t argue with you there.

**mtuan93 [02:52]**

might as well introduce myself.  
I’m mark who thinks currently trying to get into uni might  
have been the worse decision he ever made.

**kimseokjin_1992 [02:52]**

i’m seokjin (if that wasn’t obvious), who’s currently  
a  undergrad who doesn’t know what time or sleeping  
patterns are any more.  
he/him pronouns

**mtuan93 [02:52]**

oh  
uh, he/him pronouns too then  
it’s nice to meet you, seokjin.  
your name isn’t very english.

**kimseokjin_1992 [02:53]**

my parents are korean.

**mtuan93 [02:53]**

cool. mine are taiwanese. my chinese name’s yien.

**kimseokjin_1992 [02:53]**

yien’s cute.  
which name do you prefer?

**mtuan93 [02:55]**

mark.  
sorry I almost fell asleep.

**kimseokjin_1992 [02:55]**

i think you should go to sleep, mark.  
you’ve done your job, your room looks awesome  
and you can see floor. now it’s time to sleep.

**mtuan93 [02:55]**

okay. good night, seokjin.

**kimseokjin_1992 [02:55]**

night, mark.

 

 

 

 

**mtuan93 [10:26]**

hey.

**kimseokjin_1992 [10:30]**

hi!

**mtuan93 [10:30]**

I feel like if I try and apologise for this morning you’re  
going to tell me I don’t need to worry about it.

**kimseokjin_1992 [10:30]**

that would be correct.  
any time you choose to clean your room is worth taking.

**mtuan93 [10:32]**

why do I get the distinct feeling you don’t clean as often  
as you want.

**kimseokjin_1992 [10:32]**

time is a man-made construct. why do we follow it?  
why do we need to follow it? would it really be too much  
of a chaotic life if we just forgot time existed?

**mtuan93 [10:32]**

I’m not really good at advice but can I interest you in a  
sarcastic comment?

**kimseokjin_1992 [10:32]**

normally i would take your offer on but i get enough  
of that from another friend of mine.  
just accept that once you choose your uni you’re going  
to miss sleep and proper food and not working a  
day in your life like long lost first loves.

**mtuan93 [10:33]**

if things are really that bad then why don’t you drop out  
anyway?

**kimseokjin_1992 [10:33]**

the fuck these are the best years of my life. i wouldn’t  
go back on my decision for a single second. no  
amount of bribery is good enough for kim seokjin.

**mtuan93 [10:33]**

alright then.  
you know how you said that you grew up in england?

**kimseokjin_1992 [10:33]**

yeah, i was born here. why?

**mtuan93 [10:34]**

how come you write your name like that?

**kimseokjin_1992 [10:34]**

my parents didn’t want me to grow up ignorant of  
where i came from, so they made sure i learnt as much  
korean as i learnt english, so i’m fluent in both languages  
and i know customs from both countries.  
they wanted korean customs to be my main customs  
though, so i thought why not make them happy and make  
an effort myself to keep korean customs as my default  
ones.

**mtuan93 [10:35]**

that’s really nice of you, wow.  
people over here get ridiculed a lot for their cultures  
they don’t tend to cling to them much. honestly,  
it really sucks. because I know mandarin and I can  
still remember spanish from when I lived in south  
america, but nobody really wants to speak either with  
me.

**kimseokjin_1992 [10:35]**

i’m more than sure you’ll be able to find people at uni  
that you can speak to in whatever language you  
want. because this is uni now, and the percentage of  
people actually thinking bullying is still cool is  
remarkably lower than that in high school or whatever.  
and if you still get problems, just hit me up and i’ll fight  
someone for you.

**mtuan93 [10:35]**

whoa, have I escalated to defense level friendship  
already?

**kimseokjin_1992 [10:36]**

you’re a cool kid i wouldn’t mind having as my friend.

**mtuan93 [10:36]**

well that’s another pro to add to plym’s list.

**kimseokjin_1992 [10:36]**

my life’s dream has been fulfilled.

**mtuan93 [10:36]**

I’m glad I could help you accomplish your dream goal  
but I need to go to work.  
ttyl?

**kimseokjin_1992 [10:36]**

ttyl!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_15th february_ **

**rapgod [09:05]**

so

**jaxon [09:05]**

so

**rapgod [09:06]**

geniuses don’t need great hand-eye coordination

**jaxon [09:06]**

what did you do this time

**rapgod [09:06]**

i may have poked myself in the eye while trying to  
drink my smoothie

**jaxon [09:07]**

oh ffs

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_18th february_ **

**mtuan93 [16:54]**

that’s it, my choice has been made.  
I want out of this country.

**kimseokjin_1992 [16:57]**

?

**mtuan93 [16:57]**

a real conversation I had with a friend today  
me: don’t do drugs, they fuck with your system  
friend: I don’t do drugs though, I’m not dumb  
me: don’t you smoke weed like every day?  
friend: wtf mark marijuana isn’t a drug it’s a plant seriously  
get your head out of your ass wtf

**kimseokjin_1992 [16:58]**

wow  
i’m actually rendered speechless

**mtuan93 [16:58]**

that’s it, I’m done.  
I will start a gofundme to get me out of this country.  
I’m done.

**kimseokjin_1992 [16:58]**

if the bar is set that low for you i don’t know if you’re  
going to last too long here, either. stupid doesn’t stop  
at the borders, you know.

**mtuan93 [16:59]**

you don’t understand.  
another friend of mine thought that mice didn’t have ears.  
until I asked them what the fucking satellites on top  
of their heads are for.

**kimseokjin_1992 [16:59]**

what

**mtuan93 [16:59]**

another friend would not stop asking for 27 hours  
(yes I counted) why women never have to take tests  
in order to prove a child they birthed is theirs.  
the same one then asked me with a straight face  
if it snows in japan.

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:00]**

get out while you can. don’t let them corrupt you.

**mtuan93 [17:00]**

I’m done. I’m fucking done.  
I need new friends, shit.

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:00]**

which is why you have me!

**mtuan93 [17:00]**

which is why I have you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_19th february_ **

**markiepooh [20:17]**

gaga

**must be protected [20:17]**

yien

**markiepooh [20:17]**

I’m seriously considering going to the uk for uni.

**must be protected [20:17]**

ok  
are you legit thinking about it or is this bc someone did  
some dumb shit again that makes you want to run as  
far away as you possibly can????

**markiepooh [20:17]**

legit

**must be protected [20:17]**

bc this isn’t something you can just decide without much  
thought you know

**markiepooh [20:18]**

no I know  
but I’m honestly thinking about it  
it just seems to be the better option in a lot of aspects?

**must be protected [20:18]**

like what????

**markiepooh [20:18]**

like money for halls  
everything included  
the quality of the course  
the quality of the department  
the campus being all together and not splattered here  
and there around the city  
the students there seem really open and happy to help  
and I’ve talked to a handful on separate occasions as I  
was making my decisions and stuff  
the community there sounds better than the one over  
here

**[20:19]**

I went to the open day and walked around the city with  
my mom and it seemed really nice?? it was so open and  
coastal and just really pleasant to be there  
the more I was wandering around and visiting the more  
I could see myself living there.

**must be protected [20:19]**

well it sounds pretty much like you’ve got your mind made  
up  
i think it’s safe to say that you’re more than a little sure that  
you want ot go there  
wait what are you even doing messaging me????  
isn’t it five in the morning???

**markiepooh [20:19]**

can’t really sleep  
been thinking about this too much

**must be protected [20:19]**

im sorry markie :c

**markiepooh [20:20]**

plus if I go to the uk we’ll have a smaller time gap

**must be protected [20:20]**

mark  
don’t use me as a reason to go to the uk for uni  
you should be looking for reasons it’ll be good for you  
and your future

**markiepooh [20:20]**

no no I know  
it’s just an added bonus, you know?

**must be protected [20:20]**

it would be  
our conversations could be longer and more frequent

**markiepooh [20:20]**

we need to call again sometime  
or meet up  
I miss you

**must be protected [20:21]**

!!!!!  
i miss you too!!!!  
i can try and see if i can find a weekend or something that  
i can take as free time so I can stay up or wake up early

**markiepooh [20:21]**

you know my work schedule  
I’m free whenever, really

**must be protected [20:21]**

**** i will keep you posted!!!  
now try and go to sleep, okay??  
the decision you’ve made is the right one and you won’t  
regret it  
i believe in your and your decision making  
so go get some sleep before you have to work again, okay??

**markiepooh [20:21]**

yes sir  
good night, gaga.

**must be protected [20:22]**

night markiepooh!!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sock jean, seagull, YinMoongi, mochilato © [ask-kimdaily](http://www.ask-kimdaily.tumblr.com). jaxon is also inspired by ask-kimdaily's username for jackson on Instagram — _wacksonjang_ — and jackson's dislike of his name being misspelt — that one asc episode w/ markson where jackson found his name spelt _jakson_ and called the person out lmao.
> 
> i believe the fantaken photo i found and used for namjoon in this is © KEEP ROCKIN' after some looking but i can't find them online and the photo i found is cropped so??? but if you can give me a link, give me the full photo or correct me i'd appreciate it!! wanna give all credit where credit is due.
> 
> —mack

_**20th february** _

**markiepooh [03:24]**

so i told my parents about my thoughts and they seem   
really happy about it   
mom keeps gushing about how nice england would be   
and dad keeps talking about how this will be good for me   
to see other countries and to meet people from other   
backgrounds and stuff   
they seem genuinely enthusiastic about it and it’s   
making me think it might be a really good idea

**must be protected [08:06]**

your parents will support you no matter what route you   
pick i’m sure of it   
but i’m glad you’re getting support from your parents!!!   
and your choice will be the right one no matter what   
you do  
except drugs   
or becoming an alcoholic   
those aren’t right choices

**markiepooh [08:10]**

thanks for the support jackson

**must be protected [08:10]**

any time

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_21st february_ **

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:32]**

so i have an idea.

**mtuan93 [17:32]**

is it a good idea?

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:32]**

probably not.

**mtuan93 [17:32]**

will you go to jail for it?

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:32]**

no.

**mtuan93 [17:33]**

do it

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:33]**

amazing support right there.

**mtuan93 [17:33]**

always.  
what’s the idea anyway?

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:39]**

well, it’s like half one in the morning and i’m craving  
brownies

**mtuan93 [17:39]**

as you do.

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:40]**

as you do  
so i’ve made the executive decision to go down to tesco’s  
and grab a brownie mix to make at home and inevitably  
piss off my roommates in the morning with the lingering  
scent of brownies coming from the kitchen.

**mtuan93 [17:42]**

that sounds like an amazing plan.  
but why do you crave brownies at almost two in the   
morning?

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:46]**

the heart wants what the heart wants.

**mtuan93 [17:46]**

I don’t really think this is a question on what the heart   
does or doesn’t want.

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:46]**

excuse me   
my heart craves brownies and you will not deny me the   
satisfaction of going out and buying some

**mtuan93 [17:46]**

alright alright.   
go and be free with your brownie cravings.

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:55]**

the woman at the till gave me the weirdest look for buying   
brownie mix at two in the morning   
why does everyone judge me

**mtuan93 [17:55]**

I wasn’t aware everyone judges you.

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:55]**

they just have to hear my name without seeing it written   
down to judge me

**mtuan93 [17:56]**

what?

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:56]**

they call me sock jean

**mtuan93 [17:56]**

oh my god.

**kimseokjin_1992 [16:03]**

and then when i tell them that it’s one name, why are they trying   
to make it seem like jean is my last name   
they go sockjean kim   
why don’t you just go by kim?   
because kim is my family name   
but kim’s a first name?

**mtuan93 [16:04]**

I am actually speechless I have no idea what to say other than this.

**kimseokjin_1992 [16:04]**

what

**_mtuan93_ ** **changed** **_kimseokjin_1992_ ** **’s name to** **_sock “kim” jean_ **

**sock “kim” jean [16:04]**

i cannot believe   
the disrespect   
i am never introducing you to my other friends

**mtuan93 [16:04]**

why you gotta be so mean

**sock “kim” jean [16:04]**

don’t you test me

**mtuan93 [16:05]**

:(

**sock “kim” jean [16:05]**

good bye i’m going to enjoy my brownies

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_23rd february_ **

**_chat: error_ **

**seagull [19:37]**

Does it take eighteen months for twins to be born or is it still  
nine?

**YinMoongi [19:40]**

im going to pretend i didnt see that

**hoebihoebi [19:40]**

wh

**seagull [19:40]**

gUYS NO I CAN EXPLAIN

**jinmas [19:40]**

i am never introducing you to mark.

**seagull [19:41]**

BUT HYUNG

**YinMoongi [19:41]**

just don’t, kid  
don’t

**seagull [19:41]**

D:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_**27th february** _

**jaxon [14:12]**

 

**rapgod [14:15]**

jackson why do u look sick  
do i have to fly over to hong kong just to get u to  
go to hospital  
bc i will

**jaxon [14:15]**

!!!  
you dont need to!! im okay!!

**rapgod [14:15]**

im buying tickets as we speak

**jaxon [14:16]**

!!!!!!!!!!  
i said you dont need to!!!!!

**rapgod [14:16]**

u literally look like ur gonna fall flat on ur face wtf  
why are u not taking care of urself

**jaxon [14:16]**

but i am!!!!!  
it’s the bad lighting  
youre just seeing a lot of sick people over in seoul thats all  
im finw

**rapgod [14:16]**

jackson

**[14:20]**

jackson?

**[14:24]**

jackson  
jackson what’s going on

**[14:27]**

jackson have you fainted

**[14:30]**

jackson wang

**jaxon [14:31]**

so i may have thrown up

**rapgod [14:31]**

tickets: bought

**jaxon [14:32]**

naMJOON

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_ **10th march** _

**soonshimmie is best doggo [20:08]**

jiminnieeeee

**mochilato [20:08]**

taehyungieeeee

**soonshimmie is best doggo [20:08]**

i am weak

**mochilato [20:08]**

we have been aware of this for years now

**soonshimmie is best doggo [20:09]**

true   
but today i am even weaker

**mochilato [20:09]**

what have you done

**soonshimmie is best doggo [20:09]**

well i was having lunch   
and the burger was really nice   
like mouthwatering nice  
and soonshimmie was watching me

**mochilato [20:09]**

oh no

**soonshimmie is best doggo [20:10]**

and i mean, i really couldn’t say no

**mochilato [20:10]**

how much did you eat, taetae

**soonshimmie is best doggo [20:10]**

…..  
half a burger

**mochilato [20:10]**

ffs

**soonshimmie is best doggo [20:10]**

HOW CAN I RESIST THAT FACE

**mochilato [20:10]**

WITH ONE WORD  
NO

**soonshimmie is best doggo [20:10]**

wow jimin you’re so mena

i hope you never get a dog

**mochilato [20:10]**

w o w

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_ **17th march** _

**_chat: error_ **

**seagull [02:36]**

idk who’s still alive rn but i just heard someone walk   
up the stairs and im pretty sure everyone else hasn’t   
left their rooms

**hoebihoebi [02:36]**

well it’s kind of hard to move when you’re dead

**YinMoongi [02:36]**

what are you doing in a house full of dead people in the first   
place   
do i need to come and get you

**seagull [02:37]**

what the fuck are you  
wake  
a w a k e  
i meant awake

**hoebihoebi [02:37]**

jfc

**YinMoongi [02:37]**

way to give me a heart attack dipshit

**hoebihoebi [02:37** **]**

you’re supposed to leave the murder to your hyungs,  
kookie   
you’re too young to go to jail

**YinMoongi [02:37]**

too naive too

**hoebihoebi [02:38]**

someone would take advantage of his timidness

**seagull [02:38]**

can we please focus on my original thing please   
since you two are awake

**hoebihoebi [02:38]**

oh yes sorry   
your dead family   
when’s the funeral

**seagull [02:38]**

hoseok istg

**_YinMoongi_ ** **changed** **_seagull_ ** **’s name to** **_wide awake don’t cry_ **

**wide awake don’t cry [02:38]**

hYUNG WHY

**hoebihoebi [02:38]**

you have been blessed to get a nickname from the   
one and only yin moongi   
don’t regret it

**YinMoongi [02:39]**

it’s probably just someone coming back from the toilet   
jungkook   
don’t worry about it

**wide awake don’t cry [02:39]**

but

**YinMoongi [02:39]**

do you want to go and look?

**wide awake don’t cry [02:39]**

not really….

**hoebihoebi [02:39]**

you’re fine kookie   
seriously don’t worry about it   
it’s probably just someone coming back from the loo   
like yoongi said   
listen you’re safe in your bed just roll over and go to sleep   
okay???   
we’ll see you tomorrow

**wide awake don’t cry [02:40]**

okay…  
good night

** hoebihoebi [02:40] **

night

**YinMoongi [02:40]**

night

 

 

 

 

**jinmas [09:15]**

why is jungkook’s name now wide awake don’t   
cry   
what

**hoebihoebi [10:03]**

jungkook thought his family were dead but turns out   
they were just sleeping   
except for one who was awake   
so you know   
they’re just awake he doesn’t need to mourn over   
their deaths

**jinmas [10:05]**

it’s almost frightening how well you understand yoongi

**hoebihoebi [10:05]**

<3

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_**22nd march** _

**soonshimmie is best doggo [18:16]**

so  
my little brother told me the best story today that   
i have to share with you right away  
so  
apparently  
his rival school or w/e idk  
they like play against each other in sports and are trying   
to be better than the other academically and shit  
but  
whatever  
sO  
someone put weed in the vents but nobody knows who   
or even how much it is  
the only thing they know is that they were on lockdown  
for so long that people are slowly and gradually getting  
high off their faces

**[18:17]**

they decded the lockdwon was a good idea so they could   
try and figure out who the culprit was but all i can think of  
is how much fun the philosphy students must be having  
right now

**soonshimmie is best doggo [18:25]**

it would appear that even though the school was on   
lockdown they weren’t going to find the culprit anyway  
because it was some dude from my brother’s class  
rvalry is fucking wild man

**mochilato [19:12]**

sorry!! just got back from dance practice  
o h my god  
you need to ask your brother who the hell it was so we   
can treat them for lunch for their genius or smth  
t hat was an awesome move what the fuck

**soonshimmie is best doggo [19:13]**

ikr  
i can’t believe how wild kids are these days  
but he won’t tell me who it was  
:c

**mochilato [19:13]**

but we’re not gonna tell!! we just want to congratulate

**soonshimmie is best doggo [19:13]**

he says he knows but he promised the guy he wouldn’t  
say anything  
he did promise that he’ll tell the guy he’s got our approval  
though

**mochilato [19:13]**

i guess that’ll have to be good enough  
damn  
kids be wildin  
what the hell did we even do at their age?????

**soonshimmie is best doggo [19:14]**

idk bout you but i was just concentraing on studying  
and hanging out with freinds  
i didnt have time to plot on the bets prank for my rival school  
i dont even know if i had one

**mochilato [19:14]**

i didnt really do anything etiher  
the only memorable thing i can think about to do with those years  
was when on april fools the school band decided they were going  
to follow the headmaster around for three hours straight playing  
their own version of the tellytubbies theme tune

**soonshimmie is best doggo [19:14]**

yoU FUCKING HAT  
OH MY GOD

**mochilato [19:15]**

and i had nothing to do with it  
i’m ashamed of myself

**soonshimmie is best doggo [19:15]**

OH AMWY FUCKISFGN OD  
THAT S THE FUCNNIEST THIHG

**mochilato [19:15]**

please don’t die  
i can’t make another flyer about a vacant best   
friend position

**soonshimmie is best doggo [19:20]**

i fucking ordered pizza earlier and becase i was still  
laughing too much about your school  
when the guy called to say that it was ready and i  
needed to go down and get it from him  
i wheezed and coughed really loudly over the phone   
and only just managed to get a pitiful “pizza?” out  
the guy was so quiet and i swear i panicked and was  
about to tell him about the weed when he answers me  
back with  
“yes this is pizza, pizza will always have your back”  
i went down and when we exchanged money for pizza he  
gave me a pat on the shoulder

**[19:21]**

hE THOUGHT ID BEEN CRYING BECAUSE ID BEEN  
DUMPED OR SOMETHING  
NT BECAUSE I WAS LAUGHING ART A MARIACHI BAND  
PLAYING THE TELLYTUBBIES THEME TUNE

**mochilato [19:20]**

i CANT BREATHE

**soonshimmie is best doggo [19:20]**

THIS IS WHAT I GET FOR YOU BEING MY BEST  
FRIEND

**mochilato [19:20]**

IM LITERALLY DYING  
CARVE PIZZA ON MY TOMBSTONE  
THATS ALL I WANT  
SERVE IT AT MY FUNERAL

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_**31st march** _

**must be protected [12:36]**

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
i have no idea if you’re awake  
or sleeping like i told you to  
but i’m super excited!!!!!!  
i’m at the airport waiting for my flight!!  
i’m going to get to meet namjoon again and it’s   
going to be so cool omg  
omg omg omg omg omg omg

**must be protected [12:38]**

this lady won’t stop staring at me from where she’s sat   
a little away  
i think it’s because i won’t stop jiggling my leg  
i can’t help it  
i’m really excited holy shit  
maybe i can convince him to rap for me in person  
omg

**markiepooh [12:40]**

gaga!  
sorry about that I ended up having a bit of an indepth  
conversation with my sister about uni  
but the day’s finally come, huh?  
I hope you fly safely!  
and fuck that old woman you can be as excited as you   
goddamn want

**must be protected [12:40]**

markie!!!!!!!  
the plane’s taking so long to come  
i don’t think it’s even here yet  
ahhhhh i can’t wait

**markiepooh [12:40]**

if he does rap for you though you gotta record it   
and send it to me you got that

**must be protected [12:41]**

sir yes sir!!!!!!  
trust me if he actually does rap for me in person the whole   
world’s going to know about it  
ohhh i’m excited and nervous i don’t know what to do with   
myself

**markiepooh [12:41]**

rant to me about him

**must be protected [12:41]**

…….  
i can do that  
i’ve never sent you a photo of him, have i???

**markipooh [12:41]**

I don’t think so

**must be protected [12:42]**

this is namjoon  
aka a rap god  
he’s going to be 23 this year like me!!!  
he’s from south korea but watched reruns of friends in order to   
teach himself english  
he’s practically fluent  
he also knows japanese and is very close to learning mandarin!!  
he’s asked me to help him out when he starts so he can get the   
hang of using it in an actual conversation and not just be able   
to recite it from a textbook kinda thing  
he’s constantly messaging me about social issues and how to   
change the world and what we can do in hypothetical situations   
and figuring out how to make fairness out of an unfair  
situation  
he’s shown me some lyrics he’s written and????? i’m??????  
so??????????

**[12:43]**

when we first met he was super against being wrong   
and didn’t understand that he wasn’t always right and  
that even if he didn’t want to be, sometimes he could  
be an asshole???  
like subtle misogynistic due to society conditioning and all that  
and he’d rant to me and ngl we did have fights and  
arguments and everything but he made the effort  
to actively change????  
he did a hell of a lot of looking up and started  
talking to other people to get their opinions on things  
on what he was doing wrong an dhow he could improve  
and honestly he’s such a big an dbetter person now???  
and he supports lgbt vocally  
like  
in the country he’s in with all of that still taboo-like shit  
he’s out there watching gay movies and making subtle  
statements and he doesn’t care  
like  
!!!!!!

**[12:44]**

he’s super clumsy though too and he keeps updating me  
on the dumb shit he does on a daily basis i’m honestly  
surprised the man’s still alive ic annot tell you the  
amount f time ive received a message from him telling me  
that’s he’s just tripped up another hill  
the man tripped over a goddamn pencil when he was two  
what the fuck  
but he gets all shy and smiley when people praise him????  
and sometimes he scrunches his face up when he grins  
and he’s literally the xD emoji i  
im not shitting you  
look at this fucker

he’s really caring about his friends and really tries to make sure   
that everyone is okay and doing well

**[12:45]**

and if something happens he’s there with advice and if not the  
amount of swear words he sends over is amazing  
he’s so sweet and willing to do stuff to make sure people are  
okay and they feel understood and aren’t left out  
he facetimed me once when i couldnt sleep bc i was nervous  
over one thing or another idrr  
and when i checked back that call was like five hours long or so  
and i felt so bad because he had work and didn’t sleep long  
enough but he made sure that i knew he didn’t mind and just  
he’s really friendly and funny and smart  
like stupid smart  
like iq of 148 smart

**[12:46]**

he deserves the world and i would fight for him

**markiepooh [12:46]**

wow  
he seems really chill  
and you also have it really bad

**must be protected [12:46]**

shit i have it really bad

**markiepooh [12:46]**

but you’re going to enjoy yourself so much I know it  
so only worry about getting on that damn plane

**must be protected [12:46]**

SPEAKING OF PLANES  
my gate has been called!!!!!  
i will send you a message when i land but i 100% expect  
you to be asleep by then  
so sweet dreams yien and i’ll speak to you later!!!!

**markiepooh [12:48]**

have a safe flight and go hug your man!

****_markiepooh_** **changed** ** _must be protected_** **’s name to** ** _would fight for namjoon_** **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel the need to explain that a lot of the conversations are based off of posts I've seen on tumblr. i am not that creative lmao.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm very weak and decided to upload another chapter two days after the last, fucking sue me this is fun for me lmao.
> 
> sock jean, seagull, YinMoongi, mochilato © [ask-kimdaily.](http://www.ask-kimdaily.tumblr.com)
> 
> —mack

**_31st march_ **

**would fight for namjoon [19:02]**

so namjoon’s asleep now  
but i arrived safely!!!!!  
sorry i got super distracted by namjoon and  
everything when he came to pick me up so i  
couldn’t message you back  
but omg  
he can’t drive??? like he’s so clumsy that he has  
decided that he won’t get his driver’s license  
and he said that it was either going to be us taking  
public transport or having one of his friends give  
us a lift  
and he said that because he didn’t think i’d want  
to be stuffed on a bus with my luggage he managed  
to bribe his friend to give us a lift  
his friend is super cool too!!  
manage to chat to both of them in the car and might  
see if i can make a new friend by the end of this trip  
but we’ve just eaten and namjoon fell asleep halfway  
through a friends episode  
because the nerd said we were going to watch them  
when i came over  
you better be sleeping now and i’ll send you messages  
later when i get the time  
i’m now going to bug namjoon in person since he can’t  
put his phone down on me

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_1st april_ **

**markiepooh [03:14]**

it sounds like you’re having a really nice time!  
you better be the one sleeping now  
and keep me updated  
I need to know that my best friend is doing well  
and happy so I don’t have to catch a plane and  
beat up a bitch

**would fight for namjoon [23:03]**

omg youre the best best friend  
but i’m very happy!!  
we did a little today but  
he took me around the city on like a walking type  
tour thing??  
it was kind of a meander bc he didn’t want to do  
too much on my first day aww  
he showed me all his favourite spots and everything??  
and even though he’s in seoul for uni and it’s super busy  
and everything  
there are still some super quiet and calm places that  
you can go and sort of just be alone with your thoughts??

**[23:14]**

oh!! namjoon actually wants to say something???  
hold on  
hey its namjoon  
jackson talks a lot about u and i thought ud want  
to hear from me in person, sort of, that im going  
to make sure jackson doesnt have any bad times  
while visiting korea

**markiepooh [23:14]**

oh hi hello  
I didn’t expect to get messages from you but I’m glad  
you’re taking jackson’s health and happiness seriously  
because if you didn’t we would have a problem

**would fight for namjoon [23:14]**

i promise u it is a very serious business  
he was happy the last time we met up so id like to take  
that as a positive in my favor

**markiepooh [23:15]**

alright  
I’ll trust you

**would fight for namjoon [23:15]**

thank u  
i just have one question

**markiepooh [23:15]**

go ahead

**would fight for namjoon [23:15]**

why is this jackson’s name

**markiepooh [23:15]**

he is hardcore #1 in your defense squad and would  
give someone a black eye for you without hesitation

**would fight for namjoon [23:15]**

oh

**markiepooh [23:15]**

he is very attached to you

**would fight for namjoon [23:15]**

im very attached to him  
but idk about this fight business

**markiepooh [23:16]**

if I were you I’d take it as a compliment

**would fight for namjoon [23:16]**

jackson just turned to me and said that he would  
fight for me but he would die for u

**markiepooh [23:16]**

don’t worry you’ll get there some day

**would fight for namjoon [23:16]**

i might be a little scared

**markiepooh [23:16]**

he means well

**would fight for namjoon [23:16]**

okay markie!! it’s gaga now  
we’re about to watch my favourite movie because  
namjoon says he’s never seen it  
hope your day goes well!!!

**markiepooh [23:16]**

you two have fun!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_3rd april_ **

**soonshimmie is best doggo [12:16]**

okay i have no idea what kind of life this guy’s living  
or what kind of morning he’s had  
but we were going to watch an educational video  
thing i guess  
in class but that shit was way too birght  
so the professor said “hit the lights for me please” since  
she’s preggers and her back’s killing her a lot  
the past month  
so this guy gets up and fucking full out punches the  
light switch and fucking breaks it  
what is your twin doing here

**mochilato [13:46]**

excuse me  
i would not break a fucking light like that  
i’m not dumb

**soonshimmie is best doggo [13:47]**

jimin  
you would 110% punch a lightswitch if you were as  
out of it as that guy  
and you would 110% break it because you are ripped  
to high heaven and i bet you could kill anyone with a  
single punch to the nose

**mochilato [13:47]**

where the hell did you get this confidence in me from??

**soonshimmie is best doggo [13:47]**

you’ve sent me  
so many photos of you in just a tank top  
loose and tight  
and you’re fucking msucular as shit what am i suppoed  
to think  
sometimes i’m scared to challenge you because it looks  
like you could knock me out without breaking a sweat

**mochilato [13:47]**

i cannot believe

**soonshimmie is best doggo [13:48]**

please don’t kill me  
i swear i’ll e good and do whatever you say i want to  
live

**mochilato [13:48]**

i won’t kill you tae  
but only because you’re cute and you send me updates  
of soonshim

**soonshimmie is best doggo [13:48]**

wow  
you only keep me around for my dog  
what a betrayal

**mochilato [13:49]**

your dog is cuter than you and i’m not sorry

**soonshimmie is best doggo [13:49]**

yeah who am i kidding lmao

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_5th april_ **

**markiepooh [11:48]**

my friends are  
weird??

**would fight for namjoon [11:48]**

??????????

**markiepooh [11:48]**

they seem to be in a state of unsure whether or not they’re  
happy I might be going to another country to start studying   
again

**would fight for namjoon [11:49]**

why???

**markiepooh [11:49]**

well some think it’s really cool and said that they would  
call me an idiot if i decide to let the opportunity pass   
while others didn’t look enthused but still said they   
were happy for me   
and then some just downright didn’t say anything but had   
this sour look on their faces?  
I told them we could still keep in touch and that this didn’t   
mean that our friendship was over or anything   
but that didn’t seem to do much

**would fight for namjoon [14:32]**

sorry, namjoon and i went to lunch  
well i dont really know what to say????  
other than it seems like they’re being kinda selfish and   
not really putting you first??  
i mean, ngl, i dont like your friends   
and ive told you this before   
but i think you keeping that many high school friends outside   
of high school years is a mistake??  
i mean you told me yourself your high school years were   
average and your friends varied between pressuring you   
into doing things they thought were cool and   
letting you do what you want

**[14:33]**

and honestly it’s a shame about what happened when  
you went to uni the first time because those were   
friends that would have been worth keeping around   
but look   
this is your life, yeah?? this affects what’s going to happen   
to you for the rest of your life   
not them or their life   
so it doesn’t matter if they don’t like it or don’t agree with it   
or just want you around for whatever reason   
because if they really were your friends   
they’d know that distance doesn’t come between relationships   
i mean look at us   
we’ve been talking for how many years now??? and i consider you   
my best friend

**[14:34]**

and just because i’m in hong kong and you’re in la  
and there’s a 15 hour time difference doesn’t mean I’m suddenly   
not going to make the effort to talk to you   
so it’s bullshit   


**would fight for namjoon [14:40]**

hey its namjoon  
sorry i couldn’t help but ask what jackson was getting  
annoyed about and i wanted to offer u a bit of advice???  
idk if ull take it or not but   
just talk to them   
ask them why they’re not happy or whatever   
see what they say  
idk ur situation but it sounds like ur friends rlly don’t like  
change in their routines  
and from the little that jackson told me it seems like they  
like having u around and stuff but not always for the best  
intentions towards u or smth  
so this may be them being genuinely upset or it may be them  
trying to guilt trip u into staying when you don’t really want  
to do that

**[14:41]**

miscommunication is the worst thing in any relationship so  
just openly talk to them and try and get them not to avoid  
answering  
or ur probably going to leave on bad terms in some way and  
ur not going to have a good time whenever you think about  
them or they try and contact u or whatever  
i hope u figure something out

 

 

 

 

**_chat: error_ **

**YinMoongi [11:21]**

you all remember that girl who took the  
piss out of my dress a couple of months ago   
well she came and apologised for it

**jinmas [11:21]**

damn right

**YinMoongi [11:21]**

bc she hadnt realised that id overheard

**jinmas [11:21]**

oh

**YinMoongi [11:21]**

and bc she wanted me to translate a sentence  
for her into korean so she could get it tattooed   
wherever

**hoebihoebi [11:22]**

excuse me

**wide awake don’t cry [11:22]**

who does that???

**jinmas [11:22]**

my offer to fuck her up still stands, you know

**wide awake don’t cry [11:22]**

you didn’t translate the sentence for her, did you?

**YinMoongi [11:22]**

i did

**hoebihoebi [11:23]**

hyung wtf

**wide awake don’t cry [11:23]**

i still cant get used to seeing hyung written in  
something other than hangul

**jinmas [11:23]**

yoongi what did you do

**YinMoongi [11:23]**

idk what you mean

**jinmas [11:24]**

min yoongi

**hoebihoebi [11:24]**

i think you mean yin moongi

**YinMoongi [11:24]**

she just wanted this phrase translated  
and she apologised   
so i decided to help her

**jinmas [11:24]**

what was the phrase, yoongi

**YinMoongi [11:25]**

he completes me

**jinmas [11:25]**

and what did you translate it as, yoongi

**YinMoongi [11:25]**

너는 음창객끼예요*

**jinmas [11:25]**

i

**wide awake don’t cry [11:25]**

형!**

**hoebihoebi [11:26]**

for the record, kookie, that is a very fair use  
of curse words

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_8th april_ **

**_jacksonwang852_ ** **opened a new chat with** **_mtuan93_ ** **and** **_kimdaily_ ** **!**

 **_jacksonwang852_ ** **named the chat:** **_new friends!_ **

**jacksonwang852 [12:15]**

yien!!!!  
namjoon was asking about being able to talk  
with you through his own account  
and you know  
my two closest friends getting to know each other  
seemed like a really cool idea  
so i hope you don’t mind??

**kimdaily [12:15]**

hey

**mtuan93 [12:18]**

I don’t mind at all  
sorry I can’t stay there’s a thing going on  
but I have no problem with this whatsoever

**jacksonwang852 [12:18]**

look after yourself please, markie!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_12th april_ **

**_chat: error_ **

**jinmas [10:24]**

so i may have just found the best thing ever  
and it’s welcome to night vale

**hoebihoebi [10:25]**

wh

**YinMoongi [10:25]**

what  
how could you have only found out about wtnv now  
those podcasts have been around since forever  
what were you doing with your life

**jinmas [10:25]**

well excuse me when i thought i could share a nice  
little thing with you all without getting chewed out

**YinMoongi [10:25]**

i cannot believe you didn’t know about it  
i fucking spoke to you about it  
and you told me i listen to some of the weirdest shit   
ever  
and then also told me you’d never listen to it because   
“it sounds like a headache”

**jinmas [10:26]**

proof or it didn’t happen

**YinMoongi [10:26]**

istfg jin

**wide awake don’t cry [10:26]**

what’s a night vale

**hoebihoebi [10:26]**

i

**YinMoongi [10:26]**

kim seokjin you will give me mark’s contact info right this  
second because i need new friends and i desperately   
do not want to skin jungkook alive

**wide awake don’t cry [10:26]**

i don’t understand but thank you?

**YinMoongi [10:26]**

it has nothing to do with you

**hoebihoebi [10:26]**

yoongi wouldn’t survive jail

**YinMoongi [10:26]**

i would hit you but it’s true  
where is kin because i swear

**hoebihoebi [10:26]**

kin

**wide awake don’t cry [10:26]**

i still don’t know what a night vale is

**YinMoongi [10:26]**

JIN

**jinmas [10:27]**

suddenly i can’t read i know nothing

**YinMoongi [10:27]**

i hate you all

**jinmas [10:29]**

i just managed to set up that waiting for the bus song  
as my ringtone

**hoebihoebi [10:29]**

awesome!!

**wide awake don’t cry [10:29]**

is no one going to answer me  
really

**jinmas [10:29]**

jungkook  
you have something called google at your disposal  
and it’s amazing because you can use it to find out all   
kinds of information about anything your little heart  
desires  
if you haven’t tried it out before, i suggest you  
you’ll have so much fun!

**hoebihoebi [10:29]**

jin doing his best

**YinMoongi [10:30]**

if that’s your best i’m disappointed

**jinmas [10:30]**

your nb arse is asking for my foot right up it

**YinMoongi [10:31]**

i do not have a foot kink so id appreciate it if you  
didn’t

**jinmas [10:31]**

did i say it would feel good

**wide awake don’t cry [10:31]**

what is any of this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *’you’re a diseased bitch’ ft yoongi being a lil shit with polite speech rather than the informal speech usually used with insults.
> 
> **'hyung' written in hangul.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> going to england in a few days so don't know the time/energy i'll have to update so. that's my excuse for uploading so many chapters so close together. sue me.
> 
> also the boys!!!! won!!!!! im!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> 
> sock jean © [ask-kimdaily](http://www.ask-kimdaily.tumblr.com).

**_15th april_ **

**bboy king [13:49]**

did u listen to the song

**puppy eyes [13:49]**

i did!!!!  
it sounds really cool and i love the base so much wow  
ar eyou seriously going to try and dance to it??

**bboy king [13:50]**

not me  
my childhood friend remember  
he wanted me to rec a song so i thought of this one  
do u think itd fit

**puppy eyes [13:50]**

this the childhood friend that you gushed about for so long  
and practically got all heart eyes about when namjoon mentioned  
him that one time in front of me?????

**bboy king [13:52]**

shut up

**puppy eyes [13:52]**

then i think it’s wonderful!!!  
i think he’ll dance rlly well to it and i cant wait to see!!!!

**bboy king [13:53]**

see

**puppy eyes [13:53]**

you’re filming his performance whether you like it or not  
i want to see it  
it’ll be an experience

**bboy king [13:53]**

idk how to feel abt this

**puppy eyes [13:54]**

wait  
have you not looked up the lyrics to this????  
i mean i know your english isnt good and stuff  
but surely

**bboy king [13:54]**

excuse me

**puppy eyes [13:54]**

you must have been curious about what it is he’s singing that  
accompanies the audio version of sex right

**bboy king [13:54]**

my english is not bad thank you very much

**puppy eyes [13:55]**

…. you totally know what the lyrics are don’t you

**bboy king [13:55]**

gtg

**puppy eyes [13:55]**

sneaky fucker

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_17th april_ **

**sock “kim” jean [10:05]**

hey   
have you managed to make a decision yet on which   
uni you’re going to go to?

**little cock [10:05]**

yes.   
I have decided that I want to get out of the country.   
I’m coming to the uk.

**sock “kim” jean [10:05]**

whoa, that’s cool!  
i hope yo  
EYYYYYY BOIS COMING TO ENGLAND   
ITS TIMET O MEET   
LET ME SEE UR FAaEFHISfsgmd

**little cock [10:06]**

what the actual living hell

**sock “kim” jean [10:06]**

sorry sorry sorry  
i have terrible friends who have decided that hijacking my   
phone is a good idea   
ignore that

**little cock [10:06]**

your friends know about me?

**sock “kim” jean [10:06]**

yeah   
i mentioned you in passing conversation and now they’ve   
been adamant about talking to you at some point

**little cock [10:06]**

are those the same friends you told me you were never going   
to introduce me to?

**sock “kim” jean [10:06]**

indeed they are

**little cock [10:07]**

and I’m still not going to be introduced to them, am I?

**sock “kim” jean [10:07]**

not if i can help it

**little cock [10:07]**

what about when I get to uk?  
I’ll need friends.

**sock “kim” jean [10:07]**

and you can make friends   
trust me when i say i’m doing you a favour

**little cock [10:07]**

you’re my friend aren’t you

**sock “kim” jean [10:07]**

i might be

**little cock [10:08]**

and when I come to the uk we’re going to hang out  
together and stuff, right

**sock “kim” jean [10:08]**

there is a possibility

**little cock [10:08]**

so won’t I at some point meet up with your friends since  
all of us know you and will want to hang out with you

**sock “kim” jean [10:08]**

i’m not introducing you to them

**little cock [10:08]**

:(

 

 

 

 

**_chat: new friends!_ **

**kimdaily [03:56]**

i hate when u say “i hate this song” and then someone  
else comes and says “but u have to admit it’s catchy”  
the fucking plague is catchy doesn’t mean it’s a good  
fucking thing

**kimdaily [03:59]**

how did people first figure out that it was cicadas that make  
that noise? it must have taken them forever because those  
bastards shut the fuck up every time you walk near them how  
the shit would they have found out  
was there just a moment in time where people would very  
casually and without a thought say “ah, yes, the trees are  
screaming. they do that in summer.”

**kimdaily [04:05]**

the word “nun” is just the letter “n” doing a cartwheel

**mtuan93 [04:06]**

what

**jacksonwang852 [07:35]**

welcome to lack of sleep completely killing namjoon’s  
brain-to-mouth filter

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_20th april_ **

**markiepooh [09:26]**

so I’ve made a decision and I’m going to go to the  
uk to uni

**would fight for namjoon [09:28]**

ah i’m proud of you!!!!!!  
this is a huge step but i’m very proud and i bet you’re  
not going ot have a lot of problems and it’s going to be  
so much fun  
!!!!!!!!  
you’ve already got some friends there haven’t you????  
seokjin??????

**markiepooh [09:28]**

yeah  
he seems really nice and like he doesn’t mind my company  
and he hasn’t said anything against meeting up whenever  
I suggest it once I go over there  
so that’s a plus

**would fight for namjoon [09:29]**

see????? you don’t need to worry too much!!!!  
and there’ll be people there at the uni that you can talk to if  
you feel homesick or if you’re having second thoughts  
or whatever  
i’m pretty sure you’re not going to be alone either  
there will be other students there who miss their own homes  
just as much and will probably not find it weird  
if you start venting or whatever

**markiepooh [09:30]**

thanks gaga

**_would fight for namjoon_ ** **changed** **_markiepooh_ ** **’s name to** **_certified adult_ **

**certified adult [09:30]**

omg

**would fight for namjoon [09:30]**

my best friend is finally growing up right  
i’m so happy for you!!

**certified adult [09:31]**

seriously  
thank you  
it’s nice to have a friend who’s full on supporting me about  
this

**would fight for namjoon [09:31]**

what do you mean????

** certified adult [09:31] **

well  
I’m just a little nervous about telling my friends here  
about the fact that I’m going to england for uni?

**would fight for namjoon [09:31]**

i’m telling you now, mark tuan, you need to cut out the  
toxic people from your life  
and the friends you’ve got there sound super toxic to me  
so i have no idea why you’re even still friends with them

**[09:32]**

what they did to you wasn’t fair and how they expect you  
to forever be there for them to do whatever they want  
to do really fucks with me  
look  
i hate lying  
especially to you  
but i need you to do me a favour  
and if this whole thing ends badly, and they can’t accept  
that you growing up means you’re going to be doing stuff  
fo ryourself and not just for them  
get rid of them  
show them the door  
i do not need my best friend to keep coming to me at early  
hours of the morning a nervous wreck becuase of something  
s ome fucktard friend of his said  
do you understand me?

**certified adult [09:33]**

yes

**would fight for namjoon [09:33]**

do you promise me?

**certified adult [09:33]**

I promise

**would fight for namjoon [09:33]**

good  
and whatever happens  
i’m always going to be here for you  
always

**certified adult [09:33]**

I know

**would you fight for namjoon [09:33]**

love you

**certified adult [09:34]**

love you too gaga

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_23rd april_ **

**little cock [03:05]**

so I don’t know if you’re awake  
but I’m not having a good time

**sock “kim” jean [03:20]**

sorry about that  
what’s up mark?

**little cock [03:20]**

I told my friends that I’m going to england to try studying  
again and they didn’t take it really well

**sock “kim” jean [03:20]**

what happened?

**little cock [03:22]**

these are friends I’ve had since high school, yeah? so  
we’ve grown up quite a lot together and we know all  
the embarrassing shit that we’ve done over the years.  
you know, the typical stuff long-term friends know about  
each other. but during my first uni run, I fell into a lot of  
problems between these friends on so many degrees  
that they kind of scared off the uni friends that I had?  
and at the time I didn’t know, because I clung to the  
fact that the people I’d known for so long must know  
me the best and must be the best for me, you know?  
and tonight when I told them I was leaving they tried  
to guilt trip me into staying with them, staying in the us,  
and then started saying that things wouldn’t be good if  
I left and it wouldn’t be the same and I’d regret my choice  
and some other bullshit.

**sock “kim” jean [03:23]**

oh my god

**little cock [03:23]**

and it just kind of lead into a massive fight. like, it didn’t  
get too physical, they pushed me a few times or whatever,  
but I just called them out on all their bullshit and basically  
told them that I didn’t want them in my life any more,  
even if I did stay in the us. I don’t wanna see them any more  
you know?

**sock “kim” jean [03:24]**

please fly here so i feel like i can protect you better than  
just on the other side of a computer screen

**little cock [03:24]**

and I was going to message my best friend about this,  
but he’s been against them since I told him about the  
things they pulled during high school and uni  
I don’t think I’m ready to face his caring but very blatant  
I told you so’s yet  
I hope this is okay

**sock “kim” jean [03:24]**

yeah no this is absolutely fine  
you caught me on a day where my lecturer actually sent  
us an e-mail saying class is cancelled for today

**little cock [03:25]**

I’m sat here at three in the morning nursing my second  
bottle of blu because I feel sad for myself and can’t believe  
I let myself have friends like that

**sock “kim” jean [03:25]**

hey  
don’t  
you were young and you didn’t know any better  
when you don’t have experience you are so easily influenced  
by everything around you, you cannot blame yourself for this  
this is not your fault  
it’s not your fault that people took advantage of your personality  
for personal and wrongful reasons  
i have no idea what they did but they sound like arseholes and  
even if you’re hurting now, and you’re thinking about every  
single friendship you’ve ever had and whether or not it was  
genuine  
in the long run it’s going to do you so much good, you have no  
idea  
future you is going to thank the you of now for doing this

**little cock [03:26]**

thank you seokjin  
do you think you could tell me some jokes?  
something to make me feel better, you know?

**sock “kim” jean [03:26]**

yeah sure no problem  
uh  
why was oedipus against profanity?

**little cock [03:27]**

I don’t know why

**sock “kim” jean [03:27]**

because he kissed his mother with that mouth

**little cock [03:27]**

ah

**sock “kim” jean [03:27]**

what’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and  
a lobster with breast implants?

**little cock [03:27]**

I don’t know

**sock “kim” jean [03:27]**

one’s a crusty bus station and one’s a busty crustacean

**little cock [03:28]**

okay I laughed

**sock “kim” jean [03:28]**

what kind of fish is made of only two sodium atoms?

**little cock [03:28]**

?

**sock “kim” jean [03:28]**

2Na

**little cock [03:28]**

I laughed again

**sock “kim” jean [03:29]**

what did earth say to other planets?  
wow. you guys have no life.  
what did baby corn say to mummy corn?  
where’s popcorn?  
what’s a cannibal?  
someone who is fed up with people.

**little cock [03:31]**

you made me snort my blu i had to go and mop it up  
with toilet paper

**sock “kim” jean [03:31]**

i would say i’m sorry but  
instead  
do you like anti jokes?

**little cock [03:31]**

anti jokes?

**sock “kim” jean [03:31]**

for example  
why did the boy drop his ice-cream?

**little cock [03:31]**

I don’t know, why did the little boy drop his ice-cream?

**sock “kim” jean [03:31]**

because he was hit by a bus

**sock “kim” jean [03:35]**

mark?

**little cock [03:36]**

sorry sorry sorry oh my god  
I laughed so hard my brother thudded his fists loudly  
against my door until I opened it and then hissed a  
threat  
why is that funny  
oh my god

**sock “kim” jean [03:36]**

i’ll tell you two more and then you need to start getting  
ready to go to sleep  
d eal?

**little cock [03:36]**

deal

**sock “kim” jean [03:37]**

a horse walked into a bar. several people got up and left  
upon seeing the potential danger of the situation.

**little cock [03:37]**

my nose burns  
blu went up my nose  
it hurts holy fuck

**sock “kim” jean [03:37]**

i went to seafood disco last night. i pulled a muscle.

**little cock [03:38]**

I actually cackled like a witch on halloween  
okay  
thank you a lot for those  
I feel better  
I’m going to go and brush my teeth and then sleep for  
however long my body wants

**sock “kim” jean [03:38]**

i’m glad!  
i hope you sleep well  
and it’s always a pleasure to find someone with a  
similar sense of humour as mine

**little cock [03:38]**

talk to you tomorrow jin

**sock “kim” jean [03:39]**

talk to you tomorrow!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love antijokes


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YinMoongi, horse shoe © ask-kimdaily. yoongi's photos credit are [here](http://houseofalexzander.com/) and [here](https://twitter.com/suga030509).

**_26th april_ **

**_chat: error_ **

**hoebihoebi [13:11]**

qiu keeps sending me pictures from pinterest  
saying that this is what she wants our flat to look like   
i didnt even know we were moving out?????

**jinmas [13:14]**

i knew you two were married

**wide awake don’t cry [13:14]**

omfg  
congrats on your now long-term partner hoseok 

**hoebihoebi [13:15]**

i did not agree to this we’re still in student housing what  
when did she even start thinking of moving out 

**wide awake don’t cry [13:15]**

have you forgotten that this is your last year

**hoebihoebi [13:15]**

oh  
OH 

**jinmas [13:15]**

there it is

**hoebihoebi [13:15]**

IS THIS WHY SHE’S BEEN SENDING ME THIS SHIT

 

**jinmas [13:15]**

i didnt know qiu had a thing for plants

**wide awake don’t cry [13:16]**

ngl that looks really nice  
can i visit on a possibly daily basis?

**jinmas [13:16]**

are you sure that’s not just to see qiu

**wide awake don’t cry [13:16]**

i can’t read suddenly i don’t know

**hoebihoebi [13:18]**

WHY DO I NEED TO KNOW WHAT HER DREAM BEDROOm  
LOOKS LIKE

 

**jinmas [13:16]**

jungkook don’t answer that

**wide awake don’t cry [13:17]**

I WASN’T GOING TO SAY ANYTHING

**jinmas [13:17]**

come off it you have the biggest crush on qiu it’s almost  
cute  
but not quite  
it’s kinda gross

**wide awake don’t cry [13:17]**

you’re gross  
and i dont have a crush on her

**hoebihoebi [13:17]**

but you so do  
it’s so obvious  
even qiu’s asked me about it

**wide awake don’t cry [13:17]**

she what

**hoebihoebi [13:17]**

more like  
“has he acknowledged it yet?”  
“not yet”  
“give him my number when he does”

**jinmas [13:17]**

oooooooooooh 

**wide awake don’t cry [13:17]**

rieoainfkalnrgoidskl

**jinmas [13:18]**

i think you’ve broken him hobi

**hoebihoebi [13:18]**

i was just repeating word for word what she said  
to me  
i haven’t even sent the picture she told me to send  
through the groupchat

**jinmas [13:18]**

OH I WANNA SEE MY PRETTY BABY

**wide awake don’t cry [13:18]**

why do you still call her baby

**jinmas [13:18]**

because you wont

**wide awake don’t cry [13:18]**

ARHIGOERANFKDS

**hoebihoebi [13:18]**

 

**jinmas [13:18]**

YES MY BABY  
FUCKING SLAY YOU BEAUTY 

**YinMoongi [13:19]**

fuck yes qiu  
fucking gorgeous  
i think i love a woman?????

**hoebhoebi [13:20]**

awwww ur all so cute ! - q  
thank you sm ! - q  
but babes i wanna see your outfits for today too - q

**jinmas [13:20]**

 

**hoebihoebi [13:20]**

eyyyyy that’s my boy ! - q  
pink looks so good on u im jelly - q  
you do look rlly good though like wow  
even better than usual???  
teach me your ways

**jinmas [13:20]**

you guys are just too much  
but thank you <3

**YinMoongi [13:21]**

i kind of fluxed today a lot but i had two major  
outfits???

 

**hoebihoebi [13:21]**

OH NO THEY CUTE  
oh u look so small ! - q  
i just wanna hug you all day - q

**jinmas [13:21]**

absolutely stunning  
look at that little face  
but also those thigh highs though

**wide awake don’t cry [13:22]**

i bet you were turning heads because WOWZA  
GRADE A MATERIAL RIGHT THERE

**YinMoongi [13:22]**

you’re all ridiculous

**hoebihoebi [13:22]**

and - q

**YinMoongi [13:22]**

thank you

**hoebihoebi [13:22]**

<3 - q  
i need to go soon but jungkook ! - q  
u havent sent urs through yet ! - q  
i refuse to go until i’ve seen - q

**jinmas [13:22]**

yeah get to it boy

**YinMoongi [13:22]**

don’t wanna keep your lady waiting

**wide awake don’t cry [13:22]**

SHE’S NOT MY LADY  
BUT HERE

 **_jinmas_ ** **changed** **_wide awake don’t cry_ ** **’s name to** **_whipped™_ **

**whipped™ [13:22]**

 

SEOKJIN WHY

**jinmas [13:22]**

what no timbs today, kookie?

**hoebihoebi [13:23]**

we all live another day just to see you in your timbs

**YinMoongi [13:23]**

way to get my hopes up and then not deliver

**whipped™ [13:23]**

fuck you guys

**hoebihoebi [13:23]**

u look so good ! - q  
now i need to go i’ve got actual important shit  
that needs to get done - q  
peace losers <3 - q

**whipped™ [13:23]**

:)

**jinmas [13:23]**

mother

**hoebihoebi [13:23]**

fucking

**YinMoongi [13:23]**

whipped

**whipped™ [13:24]**

i hope you all drink raw eggs until you die

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_29th april_ **

**jaxon [18:47]**

are you free tonight?

**rapgod [23:29]**

im sorry jackson!  
got stuck answering a newbie’s questions bout  
underground rapping. whats up

**jaxon [23:40]**

ah, cool.  
dont worry it was nothing. did you have fun?

**rapgod [23:40]**

jackson whats wrong

**jaxon [23:41]**

nothings wrong

**rapgod [23:41]**

jackson wang dont lie to me

**jaxon [23:56]**

lan cheated on me

**rapgod [23:56]**

im buying tickets

**jaxon [24:56]**

;-;

**rapgod [23:58]**

what the actual fuck  
do u know what? the bitch didn’t deserve you. if she  
couldnt understand that she was the luckiest girl  
ever to have you as a boyfriend then fuck her. she obvi  
doesnt know how to appreciate the best things in life  
because you will definitely have been the best thing in  
her whole life. and if she wants to throw that away like   
the dumb bastard she is then go ahead.  
ur worth so much better than that, jackson. so much  
better.  
god i want to fucking skin the bitch

**jaxon [00:03]**

you made me cry you asshole

**rapgod [00:03]**

jackson  
ur one of my best friends and i mean it when i say:  
she made a mistake  
she will be regretting it every time she thinks back to  
u.

**jaxon [00:03]**

so me breaking up with her was a good idea then?

**rapgod [00:04]**

the best idea  
fuck  
that was a shitty fucking thing to do

**jaxon [00:04]**

i walked in on them  
he was in the middle of taking her bra off

**rapgod [00:04]**

jackson you dont have to

**jaxon [00:05]**

she didnt tell him to stop or jump away from him or  
anything  
she didnt say sorry or look sheepish or try and make it  
look like she regretted anything  
fuck i cat see im cryign

**rapgod [00:05]**

jackson

**jaxon [00:06]**

it hurts so much namjoon  
why did she do that?  
what did i do?  
what didnt i do?  
wasnt i good enough?

 **incoming call from** **_rapgod_ **

 

 

 

 

 

**_chat: error_ **

**whipped™ [10:11]**

why am i the only one who get shis name changed

**hoebihoebi [10:11]**

shis

**whipped™ [10:11]**

shut the fuck up

**jinmas [10:11]**

i mean i don’t see the problem with our names

**hoebihoebi [10:12]**

and do you really not realise that nothing is stopping  
you from changing names any time you want

**jinmas [10:12]**

hoseok why

 **_whipped™_ ** **changed** **_jinmas_ ** **’ name to** **_cockjin_ **

**_whipped™_ ** **changed** **_YinMoongi_ ** **’s name to** **_sugar free_ **

**cockjin [10:13]**

what the fuck

 **_whipped™_ ** **changed** **_hoebihoebi_ ** **’s name to** **_horse shoe_ **

**cockjin [10:13]**

hoseok  
i swear to god

**horse shoe [10:13]**

gOTTA BLAST

**whipped™ [10:13]**

ha  
ha  
fuckers 

 

 

 

 

 

**gloss [12:00]**

hobi

**seok [12:04]**

??

**gloss [12:04]**

i haven’t slept

**seok [12:04]**

at all??

**gloss [12:04]**

no

**seok [12:06]**

in ten

 **_gloss_ ** **erased a message [12:08]**

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_30th april_ **

**puppy eyes [21:23]**

when you commit murder wear a different perfume

**bboy king [21:25]**

and wear old clothes that are too big for you or you bought  
a decade ago

**puppy eyes [21:25]**

and shoes that aren’t your actual size

**bboy king [21:26]**

and wear gloves if you need to touch anything especially rubber  
gloves

**puppy eyes [21:26]**

and try and get the murder weapon to be something the victim  
had on them or in their house because then there isn’t any way  
they can trace it to you  
or use an icicle

**bboy king [21:26]**

if you’ve got someone you really don’t like you could always leave  
a few of their hairs at the crime scene

**puppy eyes [21:27]**

thanks for helping me think out the perfect murder

**bboy king [21:27]**

you’re welcome  
but we haven’t discussed the situation of witnesses yet

**puppy eyes [21:27]**

one thing at a time, jaebum-hyung  
one thing at a time

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_2nd may_ **

**_kimseokjin_1992_ ** **opened a chat with** **_mtuan93_ ** **,** **_minyoongi93_ ** **,** **_jung-hope_ ** **and** **_cookie_97_ ** **!**

 **_kimseokjin_1992_ ** **named the chat:** **_this is a mistake_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dw qiu isn't going to get w/ any of the boys if you were worrying lmao.  
> she's my babe and i thought the boys deserved a friend outside of the gotbang circle to make it a lil more realistic.


	6. Chapter 6

**_2nd may_ **

**_chat: this is a mistake_ **

**minyoongi93 [16:59]**

what is this

**cookie_97 [17:00]**

i’m very confused  
seokjin

**jung-hope [17:00]**

IS THIS MARK  
YOUR MARK  
ARE WE FINALLY MEETING MARK

**minyoongi93 [17:00]**

wait

**cookie_97 [17:00]**

mARK

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:00]**

oh god

**mtuan93 [17:01]**

uh

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:01]**

i warned you

**jung-hope [17:01]**

MARK  
MARK HI HELLO  
I’M HOSEOK, THE DANCER OF THIS LITTLE GROUP  
HE/HIM  
AND IT’S A PLEASURE TO FINALLY MEET YOU

**cookie_97 [17:01]**

HEY  
I’M JUNGKOOK THE YOUNGEST SO FAR  
HE/HIM  
IT’S NICE TO FINALLY MEET YOU

**minyoongi93 [17:01]**

i’m not going to caps it  
but hello mark

**cookie_97 [17:01]**

yoongi

**jung-hope [17:02]**

yoongi please

**minyoongi93 [17:02]**

fine  
I’M YOONGI, THAT ONE YOU WILL CALL FUCKER  
MORE THAN ONCE FOR VARYING DIFFERENT  
REASONS  
THEY/THEM  
IT’S NICE TO MEET YOU

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:03]**

don’t go quiet on me now mark  
you wanted this

**mtuan93 [17:03]**

i did

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:03]**

are you regretting your decision already

**cookie_97 [17:03]**

jin  
don’t sell us out so short

**jung-hope [17:03]**

it’s nice to see you have such a big amount of  
love and support for us

**minyoongi93 [17:03]**

you’re making it out as if we’re always bearing our  
teeth what the fuck

**cookie_97 [17:04]**

i thought you loved us a lot more than that

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:04]**

just introduce yourselves properly and then mark will  
in turn and we can get this shit show on the road

**cookie_97 [17:04]**

jungkook jeon, 19, he/him, currently doing a gap year  
and panicking over becoming an adult because i am not  
ready nor do i want this. slightly addicted to getting piercings  
but i regret nothing. been told im incredibly stubborn.

**jung-hope [17:04]**

and has a crush on qiu

**cookie_97 [17:04]**

i do not have a crush on qiu  
you’re speaking in tongues  
learn english

**minyoongi93 [17:05]**

yoongi min, 24, they/them, finished uni years and live alone  
in a small flat that always seems to have more visitors than  
its size should allow. i have a dog that i will lay my life down  
for. suffer from irregular sleeping patterns, so there’s a big  
chance you’ll be able to catch me if you need someone to talk  
to at stupid o’clock in the morning.

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:05]**

constantly nagged and also somehow doesn’t eat properly  
even though you constantly talk to me about how good a pizza  
or doughnut or ribs would be right now???

**minyoongi93 [17:05]**

i have a terrible memory let it go

**jung-hope [17:06]**

hoseok jung, 23, he/him, last year of uni. weird mixture of  
doing dumb things and overthinking every move to the last  
minimal detail. up for split second decisions but always lowkey  
panics about not having everything we need or doing everything  
right. suffer from insomnia and have been known to faint on  
occasion without warning.

**cookie_97 [17:06]**

and scaring the shit out of everyone around you

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:07]**

a warning is all i want so i don’t shit myself every time  
you suddenly go limp and almost smack your head into  
concrete

**minyoongi93 [17:07]**

just don’t get sent to the hospital because you’ve cracked  
your skull open and we’re good

**cookie_97 [17:07]**

jin aren’t you going to do one?

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:07]**

okay?  
kim seokjin, 24, he/him. redoing uni in something that will  
help my future career after already having gone once thanks  
to my parents.

**cookie_97 [17:08]**

really

**jung-hope [17:08]**

is that it

**mtuan93 [17:08]**

has a craving for brownies at the worst time and likes pissing  
off his dorm mates in non-serious ways and has a really good  
arsenal of antijokes that make me laugh every time

**jung-hope [17:08]**

the fuck

**cookie_97 [17:08]**

what just happened

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:09]**

see?  
i have friends outside of you guys  
and we talk

**jung-hope [17:09]**

okay

**cookie_97 [17:09]**

sounds fake but okay

**minyoongi93 [17:09]**

i believe it’s your turn for an introduction, mark

**mtuan93 [17:09]**

mark tuan, 23, having a second go at uni after the first  
time didn’t turn out so well. surrounded by a small amount  
of friends that make me lose the will to live sometimes  
and has a best friend all the way in hong kong which means  
that sometimes i don’t sleep at night enough to work  
because i’m up all night talking to him.

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:10]**

friends?

**jung-hope [17:10]**

ohhh hong kong best friend

**cookie_97 [17:10]**

can you speak mandarin???

**mtuan93 [17:10]**

okay  
“friends”  
and yeah i can  
my parents are taiwanese so you know   
kinda grew up with it

**jung-hope [17:10]**

that’s so cool!  
i’m sort of learning mandarin  
i only know korean thanks to my parents and them  
teaching me because they’re adamant about me  
being as cultural as possible about where my ancestors  
are from or something  
mandarin looks so cool though

**mtuan93 [17:11]**

ah I guess it’s cool?  
I mean I grew up with it so it isn’t really cool for me  
haha

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:11]**

anyway  
now that we know for sure that you’re coming to the uk  
and that we’re going to meet and hang out

**jung-hope [17:11]**

wait we are?

**cookie_97 [17:11]**

nEW FRIEND

**minyoongi93 [17:11]**

congrats on getting an offer and a place and accepting  
and all that

**mtuan93 [17:11]**

thanks

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:12]**

**jung-hope [17:12]**

oh snap

**minyoongi93 [17:12]**

boy’s looking real good  
that shirt looks really nice on you why’ve you been hiding  
it

**cookie_97 [17:12]**

when did you take this?

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:12]**

like a minute ago what  
i’m currently out enjoying nature  
is that so hard to believe

**cookie_97 [17:12]**

while paying a lot of attention to your phone

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:13]**

can i not have my friends company now

**mtuan93 [17:13]**

wow  
oh wow  
uh you look like you give really good hugs

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:13]**

im

**minyoongi93** **[17:13]**

he does  
he so does  
he’s the best hugger

**jung-hope [17:13]**

you just like it because he’s a lot taller than you

**minyoongi93 [17:13]**

what’s your point

**mtuan93 [17:13]**

and your hair looks  
really soft?  
you look really pretty ha

**cookie_97 [17:13]**

what is this

**jung-hope [17:14]**

do i smeel nerves mark tuan

**minyoongi93 [17:14]**

smeel

**jung-hope [17:14]**

stop

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:14]**

thank you, mark!  
i feel pretty in this lighting ngl  
the sound of the waterfall is rlly soothing too

**jung-hope [17:14]**

wait are we all sending selfies now because i  
need to find some good lighting if we are

**mtuan93 [17:14]**

uh  
I mean  
you can if you want?  
I guess it can’t hurt since we’re all gonna meet at  
some point haha

**jung-hope [17:14]**

okay you’re cute when you’re nervous  
you need to stop before i cling  
or jungkook does

**cookie_97 [17:14]**

i’m sorry what

**minyoongi93 [17:15]**

the man’s right  
you have a weird weakness for cute things

**cookie_97 [17:15]**

i do not  
liar

**_kimseokjin_1992_ ** **has sent a voice recording!**

**mtuan93 [17:15]**

whoa that sounds so relaxing and nice if you just  
lie on the grass and bask in sunlight  
why can’t i be there

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:15]**

idk if you’d want to lie down it’s not exactly super warm  
here lmao  
but for like  
ten minutes  
it’s not bad

**jung-hope [17:15]**

wuss

**minyoongi93 [17:16]**

****

stop being a baby, jungkook

**jung-hope [17:16]**

OH DAMN  
LOOK AT THEM  
I AM WEak for those glasses wow

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:16]**

quickly yoongi  
ask him to do stuff

**cookie_97 [17:16]**

IM NOT BEING A BABY  
but you look hella good today what happened

**minyoongi93 [17:16]**

brat

**mtuan93 [17:16]**

wow you look so professional  
I  
omg

**minyoongi93 [17:16]**

what

**cookie_97 [17:17]**

what

**mtuan93 [17:17]**

I just snorted because I picture you looking like this  
all nice and prim and professional and like you’ve  
got important stuff to do  
but then as soon as you start talking you’re like a sailor  
and there’s swearwords everywhere and now it’s  
escalated to a gordon ramsey style meeting with other  
people in suits while you swear at them about their  
credit score being the fucking worst  with spit flying  
everywhere

**[17:18]**

I’m

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:18]**

oh my god

**jung-hope [17:18]**

negl i snorted hard and now my nose hurts

**cookie_97 [17:18]**

the funniest thing is he’s not far from the truth

**jung-hope [17:18]**

okay my turn

**cookie_97 [17:18]**

what if i want it to be my turn  
wait  
hoseok  
hOSEOK

**jung-hope [17:19]**

**mtuan93 [17:19]**

oh you look soft

** minyoongi93 [17:19] **

hobi  
hobi where are you

**cookie_97 [17:19]**

shit

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:19]**

qiu has really done you some good  
you now look like the attractive that people will actually  
want to go up and engage in  
rather than lock themselves up when you come their way

**jung-hope [17:20]**

your compliments are always so back-handed i don’t believe  
you mean well sometimes

**minyoongi93 [17:20]**

hooobiiii

**cookie_97 [17:20]**

i’m glad you don’t look like a fuckboy any more hoseok

**jung-hope [17:20]**

as if you didn’t go through that phase longer than me  
and yes yoongi what

**cookie_97 [17:20]**

nobody went through that phase longer than you

**minyoongi93 [17:20]**

where are you  
i need to be in your presence like right now

**jung-hope [17:20]**

i’m in my house rn  
?

**minyoongi [17:20]**

on my way

**cookie_97 [17:20]**

well

**mtuan93 [17:21]**

was that a soft booty call or something

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:20]**

p much and it tends to happen quite often

**cookie_97 [17:21]**

shouldn’t it be called something else other than booty  
call

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:21]**

arm call?

**mtuan93 [17:21]**

shoulder call?

**cookie_97 [17:21]**

this may have been a mistake

**jung-hope [17:22]**

you’re also shying away from sending a selfie  
do it

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:22]**

do it do it do it do it

**cookie_97 [17:22]**

THERE

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:22]**

wow

**jung-hope [17:23]**

trying to be pouty to take back that statement of being  
weak to cute things are we

**cookie_97 [17:23]**

i just took a goddamn  
why do you always do this to me

**mtuan93 [17:23]**

you look really cute  
nice earrings by the way

**cookie_97 [17:23]**

THAKNK YOU  
FINALLY A NICE COMMENT

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:23]**

we give you nice comments

**jung-hope [17:23]**

we give you nice comments all the time

**minyoongi93 [17:23]**

wouldn’t have killed you to smile

**cookie_97 [17:24]**

istfg

**mtuan93 [17:24]**

it’s my turn now, yeah?

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:24]**

only if you feel comfortable!

**mtuan93 [17:24]**

hold on let me find a good one a friend took  
of me

**mtuan93 [17:26]**

 

**jung-hope [17:26]**

well damn

**minyoongi93 [17:26]**

damn indeed

**cookie_97 [17:26]**

oh

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:26]**

you look so cute in that jacket  
also a+ choice in beanie like wow  
do you wear them a lot

**mtuan93 [17:27]**

thanks haha  
I wear hats a lot in general I guess? I really like hats

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:27]**

they suit you! so i see why

**jung-hope [17:27]**

yoongi’s finally here and now in my lap

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:27]**

hoseok

**jung-hope [17:27]**

not like that you perv  
i’m just saying they’re probably not going to be  
speaking through their account now

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:27]**

hoSEOK

**jung-hope [17:27]**

shtfu jin  
what hobi’s trying to say is that we both agree that  
jungkook’s going to be whipped for mark

**mtuan93 [17:27]**

what why

**jung-hope [17:28]**

he has magically disappeared

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:28]**

this is the quietest he’s been in a while

**mtuan93 [17:28]**

I’m still confused

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:29]**

don’t worry about it mark  
it’s just going to be amusing to us

**mtuan93 [17:29]**

okay?

**cookie_97 [17:43]**

I WAS HELPING MY MUM WITHT HE SHOPPING  
GODDAMN IT

**jung-hope [17:44]**

don’t worry gukkie

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:44]**

liking boys is perfectly natural  
no need to freak out

**cookie_97 [17:44]**

i hate you all  
why do you have a mic though mark

**mtuan93 [17:45]**

oh  
a friend asked me to help him out with a presentation   
so I accepted and ended up having to talk into a mic   
with him for about an hour and a half

**cookie_97 [17:45]**

and another friend just casually took your photo

**mtuan93 [17:45]**

I dont take many photos of myself  
so I’m guessing they thought they were doing me   
a favor or something Idk

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:45]**

interesting how he focuses on the phallic object  
in the photo

**jung-hope [17:45]**

very interesting

**cookie_97 [17:45]**

just die

**jung-hope [17:45]**

<3


	7. Chapter 7

**_7th may_ **

**wackson [15:35]**

how am i supposed to work when i miss you and  
korea  
:c

**two story [15:37]**

it has literally been a month if that why are u having  
withdrawals already

**wackson [15:37]**

i miss you  
:C

**two story [15:37]**

i miss u too  
but u should concentrate on working rather than  
talking to me

**wackson [15:46]**

i am!!!!!  
but there are moments where im just  
doing nothing  
and you’re available

**two story [15:46]**

im shocked

**wackson [15:46]**

oh come off it  
you love my company

**two story [15:46]**

i will neither confirm or deny

**wackson [15:46]**

you’re impossible

**wackson [16:03]**

just because i actually have to try and work sometimes  
doesn’t mean you can just ignore my messages so i  
don’t even have anything to look forward to returning  
to you know

**two story [16:08]**

well what do u want me to say

**wackson [16:08]**

idk update me on your life maybe??????

**two story [16:08]**

well  
an old neighbour of mine contacted me out of the blue  
by accident and since we found out we actually know  
each other we’ve been talking  
it’s kinda cool to have an old friend back and think back  
on our memories and stuff

**wackson [16:09]**

what are they like!!

**two story [16:10]**

a year younger than me?  
almost as tall, really  
he’s really energetic and is constantly daydreaming  
and still doesn’t quite understand how the world works  
it’s cute

**wackson [16:17]**

you’re not giving me much to go off of, you know

**two story [16:17]**

well what do u want me to say?  
im not giving u his address

**wackson [16:17]**

wow  
im offended  
do you not gush over your friends what is this

**two story [16:19]**

not really?  
he’s just this little kid that stuck by me when i was younger  
and i took a liking to so we hung out and now suddenly  
he’s grown up and wants to know all about me?  
he’s a little intense but  
it’s good

**wackson [16:22]**

i just got in trouble for being on my phone so i’ll have to  
message you when i’m home  
try and show some more enthusiasm towards your new  
friend!!!!!

**two story [16:22]**

alright jacks  
don’t get too much in trouble  
i still need u

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_10th may_ **

**short fucker [17:38]**

okay so you know i’m a doctor’s receptionist right

**victorious [17:38]**

you’re a receptionist to three doctors in one small building  
that isn’t a hospital yet somehow always seems to be busy  
and not even you can explain to me how that is  
of course i know  
i’m not going to forget how you somehow manage to get  
a job that doesn’t make any goddamn sense

**short fucker [17:39]**

well  
i swear  
i don’t know what it is about this week but  
the doctors keep coming out to me once a patient’s  
left with either a deadly pale face or completely  
expressionless  
honestly i thought one was going to shit himself

**victorious [17:39]**

…  
gO ON

**short fucker [17:40]**

and because i’m the lovely kind human being that  
i am

**victorious [17:40]**

and you’re adorable as sin

**short fucker [17:40]**

and i’m adorable as sin  
i ask them what’s wrong, if they need some water  
or a painkiller or to sit down  
essentially i ask them what’s wrong right  
so they each in turn unload on me whatever it is  
that the patient’s told them that has them looking like  
they never want the human race to survive anything

**victorious [17:40]**

tell me tell me tell me

**short fucker [17:41]**

well  
on monday

**victorious [17:41]**

because discretion means nothing to us

**short fucker [17:41]**

right  
so on monday yee-nim wanders out after this woman and  
her son leave right  
and he’s looking just a little distraught????  
he stops by my desk and i turn to him and ask him as i should  
if he’s okay and can i get him some water or something  
because honestly at this point i’m expecting him to tell me that  
he’s just had a call saying that a member of his family passed  
away

**victorious [17:41]**

oh shit  
he looked that bad?????

**short fucker [17:41]**

yeah man  
i almost had a panic attack just looking at him  
but apparently doctors find this shit a hella lot more worrying  
than we do

**victorious [17:42]**

and we find this shit worrying

**short fucker [17:42]**

indeed we do  
so i finally manage to get him to to talk when i ask him if he wants  
to sit down in my chair right  
and he shakes his head and finally looks at me and asks in a very  
quiet voice  
“allergies are the ninjas of the body”

**victorious [17:42]**

what  
the fuck  
i’m pretty sure that isn’t accurate

**short fucker [17:42]**

ikr but  
turns out  
this woman had been giving her son peanut butter  
sandwiches for lunch at school but he was allergic to  
them and neither of them knew  
and their justification for it was that the woman honestly  
didn’t know peanuts were an ingredient and the boy  
a middle school student  
wasn’t smart enough to figure it out himself

**victorious [17:42]**

my god

**short fucker [17:43]**

i did my best to give him a pep-talk before he went back  
into his office/room/whatever you wanna call it  
because honestly i think he was ready to retire then and there

**victorious [17:43]**

at the ripe old age of 41

**short fucker [17:43]**

at the ripe old age of 41

**victorious [17:43]**

and nothing else happened on monday???

**short fucker [17:43]**

nothing else on monday  
tuesday was pretty normal too nothing over the top  
happened i mean  
other than a few people looking embarrassed either entering  
or exiting the building but what can you do  
but it kicks off wednesday with three different things happening  
at once  
two of them involving toh-nim

**victorious [17:43]**

i’ve got my drink and some chocolate i’m ready

**short fucker [17:44]**

so one patient goes in to see toh-nim  
and not even lying she steps out two hours later points  
at me and says incredibly loudly and snappily  
“i am never coming back here again! to be disrespected like  
that. how can you work here? you should be ashamed of yourself  
for being publicly associated with these people!”  
and storms out

**victorious [17:44]**

oH SNAP

**short fucker [17:44]**

and i’m just sat there with like  
two other patients in a very  
“what.” situation right  
and then toh-nim wanders out and she doesn’t look as lost  
as yee-nim did on monday  
she looks like the cooling period after someone who’s been  
fuming over something for just a little too long you get me

**victorious [17:45]**

i got you

**short fucker [17:45]**

she points at the door that’s been slammed shut by the old  
woman and says through gritted teeth  
“diabetes is a disease and a medical condition and needs  
medication to be treated. it needs to be TREATED!”

**victorious [17:45]**

did the woman not think diabetes was a disease

**short fucker [17:45]**

the woman didn’t think that diabetes was a disease

**victorious [17:45]**

oh  
my god

**short fucker [17:46]**

so toh-nim was sat at her desk with the woman’s medical  
background up on her computer right  
and she’s asking the woman as she browses  
“do you have any medical conditions?”  
woman: no  
and at this point toh-nim has seen she’s got diabetes  
so she’s trying to be kind because  
you never know what’s going on in people’s heads i  
guess  
toh-nim: are you sure, you’ve never been diagnosed with  
anything?  
woman, a little huffy: no, never.  
toh-nim: what medications do you take?  
woman: insulin. for my diabetes.

**victorious [17:47]**

i have officially lost all respect for the human race

**short fucker [17:47]**

and after that commences a two-hour long debate  
on whether diabetes is or is not a disease

**victorious [17:47]**

and this is one of three

**short fucker [17:47]**

one of three

**victorious [17:47]**

alright  
lay the next two on me

**short fucker [18:03]**

sorry walking home from bus stop  
anyway  
the next one was also toh-nim about maybe  
three patients after the crazy old woman  
and it also induces another long debate  
well this time it’s less a debate and more like  
a long descriptive lecture type thing  
so this woman comes in with her baby, and she’s  
hugging the child very close to her chest and kinda  
sending anxious looks to me after she’s already  
sat down and waiting  
and the only thing i can think of is that she must be  
really worried for her kid, you know?? something must  
have happened

**[18:04]**

anyway she power-walks in when it’s her turn and then  
when she comes back out she looks as if she’s seen  
jesus and he turned out to be like that third aunt  
that nobody ever really talks about except a social  
gatherings where she’s on her fifth gin and tonic, sat  
in the comfiest armchair telling you about her younger  
years and all the drugs she’s tried while refusing to  
call them drugs

**victorious [18:04]**

i know what you mean

**short fucker [18:05]**

toh-nim leans down and murmurs in my ear  
“she measures her baby’s temperature by pre-heating  
her over and sticking one hand in while having her other  
hand pressed to the baby’s forehead. she told me her baby’s  
fever was 250 degrees.”

**victorious [18:05]**

i don’t want to live any more chimchim

**short fucker [18:05]**

do you want to hear mine

**victorious [18:05]**

yours?????

**short fucker [18:05]**

i told you there were three  
the last one happened to me

**victorious [18:05]**

oh my god okay  
what the fuck did they do this time

**short fucker [18:06]**

don’t even ask me how it happened because i still have  
a headache and even thinking about it makes me want  
to face-plant into concrete but  
somehow i’m having this conversation with this man  
who’s wandered in and he’s wheezing a lil and his eyes  
are watering and shit  
he’s allergic to his cat right but it’s been a late development  
and he loves his cat doesn’t want to give him away  
so oh-nim had given him an inhaler that he was  
complaining to me about how it doesn’t work and he  
doesn’t understand why he got this when it obviously  
is a load of shit and he doesn’t understand why he had to  
pay for it  
so i tell him like  
well

**[18:07]**

if you tell us the problem then we can see if we can sort  
it out for you and find something that works so you can  
keep your cat without a problem  
just trying to be nice  
so i give him a smile and ask him why it’s not working  
he looks me dead in the eye and tells me he’s been  
spraying it on his cat and has seen no change in  
his reaction

**victorious [18:09]**

i’m fucking done

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_16th may_ **

**two story [19:07]**

i have the sex appeal of a math book

**wackson [19:08]**

idk i dont think ive ever seen someone open a math  
book and not say “fuck me” at least once

**two story [19:08]**

i  
cant really argue with that logic

**wackson [19:08]**

because its true

**two story [19:08]**

but are u insinuating that im just constantly fucking  
people over

**wackson [19:09]**

my dude my guy my pal my man  
you’re handsome  
you have model proportions  
you have dimples  
your smile and laugh are contagious  
your clumsiness is endearing

**two story [19:09]**

okay now i know ur lying

**wackson [19:09]**

your bleached hair looks really good with your skin colour  
youre one of the sweetest people ive ever met  
and you literally spit fire every other night

**two story [19:10]**

spit fire

**wackson [19:10]**

how are you not fucking people over constantly??????

**two story [19:10]**

my face feels hot u fucker

**wackson [19:10]**

ilu2 now go knock em dead


	8. Chapter 8

**_1st june_ **

**cockjin [12:01]**

okay we have a problem  
like a really big problem  
like i dont know what to do with myself problem

**sugar free [12:08]**

what

**horse shoe [12:08]**

is it really bad? do you need me?

**whipped™ [12:08]**

im confused

**cockjin [12:09]**

mark is doing stuff to me and im freaking out a little

**sugar free [12:09]**

what’s he doing

**whipped™ [12:09]**

i will skin him alive what’s he done

**cockjin [12:09]**

oh god it’s not  
it’s not like he’s insulting me or being a dick no this is  
all on me? he’s not at fault but he’s involved

**sugar free [12:09]**

im so confused

**horse shoe [12:10]**

vent jin

**cockjin [12:10]**

he likes my puns and my anti jokes  
he talks with me at random times in the day  
he doesnt judge me for wearing comfy as hell jumpers

**whipped™ [12:10]**

it was so big

**cockjin [12:10]**

he’s so sweet and like casually smart but he keeps getting insecure  
about some stuff and will ask me if he’s doing okay about things  
out of the blue that we never talked about before and he  
he trusts me and makes me laugh and plays along when i  
pretend to be mad and make threats and

**[12:11]**

i want to protect him and hold him  
and maybe hold his hand idk it sounds nice

**whipped™ [12:11]**

김석진

**horse shoe [12:11]**

oh i see  
oh jin  
that’s sweet

**cockjin [12:11]**

i don’t know what to do  
this might be the second or third time this has happened and i

**horse shoe [12:11]**

and those didnt end well  
yeah i know  
but mark seems pretty chill and it doesn’t seem like it’s blown out  
yet?  
so maybe wait until you see where it goes

**cockjin [12:12]**

hobi  
as much as i love you im pretty sure youre being an idiot right now  
there is no way i can just have a casual crush going on like  
you  
it doesnt  
that’s not how it works for me

**horse shoe [12:12]**

you just said yourself that this is the third time this has  
happened how do you know what i’m saying is bullshit?  
there’s a first time for everything

**cockjin [12:12]**

im scared hobi you’re not helping  
i need qiu

**horse shoe [12:17]**

im sorry jinnie baby im here - q  
listen - q  
i know this is scary but this isn’t going to be the same as  
the last times - q  
because everyone here knows what happened and knows  
what to look out for and knows what makes you  
uncomfortable - q

**[12:18]**

hoseok means well, he’s not trying to say that you dont have  
a reason to freak out he just likes mark and thinks that the  
boy doesnt give you much reason to be wary - q  
he hasnt shown any warning signs jin  
thats all i mean  
all of them made us iffy from the beginning but he doesnt  
you know?

**cockjin [12:18]**

no i know  
i know  
i just don’t know if i like it?  
this whole feelings thing  
i mean all of you have problems as well it’s not just me  
and that makes me feel better  
but it also kind of makes me wonder if it’s worth it?

**horse shoe [12:19]**

it’s up to you if it’s worth it or not jinnie - q  
and no matter what you choose we’re going to be here  
supporting you and behind you no matter what choice  
you think is the best - q  
but i would say talk to mark if it ever becomes obvious  
or if he starts asking questions or likes you back - q  
if hes as nice as the others are saying then hell probably  
understand and try to make sure that youre as comfortable  
as possible - q  
just don’t rush - q

**[12:20]**

let it unravel as it wants - q

**cockjin [12:20]**

okay  
i’m sorry

**whipped™ [12:20]**

never apologise  
this is a legit thing that scares you  
and that’s okay and you don’t have to feel like you’re doing  
something wrong by being uncomfortable  
it happens to all of us

**sugar free [12:20]**

exactly  
and whether or not you choose to give this guy a chance  
our opinion of you isn’t going to change  
you are a very important part of our lives and we love you

**horse shoe [12:21]**

we’re behind you whatever, okay?

**cockjin [12:23]**

love you guys

**horse shoe [12:23]**

love you too - h + q

**sugar free [12:23]**

love you, too

**whipped™ [12:23]**

ly2

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_3rd june_ **

**seok [16:06]**

so i’m sat at the usual right and because it’s a nice  
day i thought i’d sit outside and stuff  
enjoy my hot chocolate in the breeze with the warm  
sun on whatever bits of exposed skin one can get  
away with in the uk  
and  
there are so many people walking past me

**[16:07]**

or even sitting around me doing their own thing and  
just  
it sounds so fucking dumb but i’m sitting here, trying  
not to stare at everyone around me because  
fucking hell  
everyone else has a life, you know?  
like they have their own shit that goes on and it’s going  
to make them cry and laugh and feel heartbroken and  
who knows how many of these people are getting  
excited over making new friends or are getting upset  
because someone they thought they loved betrayed  
them

**seok [16:09]**

people have got complex shit going on that i know  
nothing of

**gloss [16:12]**

why are you having an existential crisis outside of the  
smallest cafe in plymouth

**seok [16:12]**

it’s not an existential crisis  
it’s more i’ve been hit in the face with something that’s  
always been there but i haven’t cared to notice until  
now

**gloss [16:12]**

there’s got to be a word for that

**seok [16:12]**

there is it’s called sonder  
but that’s not the point

**gloss [16:12]**

did you seriously google search

**seok [16:13]**

yes

**gloss [16:15]**

i was stuck staring at my phone for so long that a student  
came up to me to ask if i was crashing because of some  
test

**seok [16:15]**

don’t tell me you’re in the uni library

**gloss [16:15]**

not illegal

**seok [16:16]**

wow

**gloss [16:16]**

but on the subject of weird moods  
i feel ambedo and monachopsis often

**seok [16:16]**

what and what

**gloss [16:17]**

ambedo  
a kind of melancholic trance in which you become  
completely absorbed in vivid sensory details—raindrops  
skittering down a window, tall trees leaning in the wind,  
clouds of cream swirling in your coffee—briefly soaking  
in the experience of being alive, an act that is done purely  
for its own sake.

**seok [16:17]**

did you really copy and paste

**gloss [16:17]**

monachopsis  
the subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place,  
as maladapted to your surroundings as a seal on a beach—  
lumbering, clumsy, easily distracted, huddled in the company  
of other misfits, unable to recognize the ambient roar of your  
intended habitat, in which you’d be fluidly, brilliantly, effortlessly  
at home.

**seok [16:18]**

oh i’ve had that

**gloss [16:18]**

it’s not overly pleasant

**seok [16:18]**

no  
but then on those days i just kind of blackout everything else too  
so i don’t really notice i’m sad  
if that makes sense

**gloss [16:18]**

it doesn’t but i know

**seok [16:18]**

not feeling is probably not very healthy

**gloss [16:19]**

you sound like my psych

**seok [16:19]**

i sound like /my/ psych

**gloss [16:21]**

i just had to explain to the same student why i was  
laughing in the middle of the library  
one of their questions being how could i manage  
not to make a sound  
and when i told them i laugh silently i got a worse  
look than when they thought i was freaking  
out over an exam

**seok [16:21]**

omfg  
wow gloss  
your day is more exciting than mine

**gloss [16:22]**

are you still at the usual?

**seok [16:22]**

yeah why

**gloss [16:22]**

in ten probably

**seok [16:22]**

:D


	9. Chapter 9

**_7th june_ **

**_chat: new friends_ **

**jacksonwang852 [10:32]**

sooooooooooooooo  
i have some neeeeeeews

**mtuan93 [10:32]**

really gaga

**jacksonwang852 [10:32]**

shh!!!!!  
this is good  
just wait for namjoon to get online okay  
and trust me

**_jacksonwang852_ ** **has changed** **_kimdaily_ ** **’s name to** **_korean expert_ **

**korean expert [11:04]**

what is going on

**jacksonwang852 [11:04]**

namjoon!!  
okay so mark just told me that he wants to learn  
korean

**korean expert [11:05]**

oh cool

**jacksonwang852 [11:05]**

and i thought you could help him out!!!  
since you learned english on your own and you know  
korean you could probably give him help when he gets  
stuck!!

**korean expert [11:05]**

ah okay  
i mean  
id be happy to help out if mark wants me to

**jacksonwang852 [11:06]**

see mark  
you didnt need to worry about a thing  
you’ve got namjoon to help you out!!!!

**mtuan93 [11:06]**

right

**korean expert [11:06]**

it’s not as hard as learning english

**mtuan93 [11:06]**

oh no I know that  
honestly I’ve downloaded memrise and I’m just doing  
like an hour a day or something  
it’s a slow process

**korean expert [11:06]**

u’ll get there eventually  
memrise isn’t good on grammar though  
so maybe look for a site that’ll teach u the rules  
and stuff??  
but i will volunteer to help in any way i can

**mtuan93 [11:06]**

thanks  
I’ll get on it in my next break

**korean expert [11:07]**

np

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_9th june_ **

**_chat: this is a mistake_ **

**mtuan93 [15:42]**

“you support gay rights so you MUST be gay”  
I support animal rights do I look like a fucking alpaca  
to you

**_jung-hope_ ** **changed** **_mtuan93_ ** **’s name to** **_fucking alpaca_ **

**cookie_97 [15:43]**

you could be an alpaca  
we could just be duped  
you could have just found that photo on the internet

**fucking alpaca [15:43]**

how would I type if I was an alpaca

**cookie_97 [15:43]**

honestly  
if you understand the english language and are smart  
enough to send us a photo of a guy you’re not  
i won’t question anything you do

**jung-hope [15:44]**

bet you’re still a cute alpaca

**fucking alpaca [15:44]**

well

**cookie_97 [15:44]**

i thought we’d discussed this hyung  
bestiality is both legally and morally wrong

**jung-hope [15:44]**

would you say the same thing if i was talking about a dog

**minyoongi93 [15:44]**

he has a point

**cookie_97 [15:45]**

why am i not surprised you back hobi-hyung up

**minyoongi93 [15:45]**

i don’t know what you’re talking about

**kimseokjin_1992 [15:45]**

have i really befriended an alpaca

**jung-hope [15:45]**

a fucking alpaca

**cookie_97 [15:45]**

hyung

**jung-hope [15:46]**

fuck off

**kimseokjin_1992 [15:46]**

i would say i’m disappointed  
but i feel like it’s a testament to how my friends have  
damaged me that i feel nothing anymore

**fucking alpaca [15:46]**

wow

 

 

 

 

**victorious [21:03]**

im afraid for my life

**short fucker [21:36]**

what why

**victorious [21:36]**

ive got a long weekend atm as you know

**short fucker [21:36]**

as i know

**victorious [21:37]**

so my dad picked me up from the train station and  
it was really nice and we were catching up a little  
but not too much otherwise my mum would be angry  
right

**short fucker [21:37]**

right

**victorious [21:37]**

and there’s a lull in the conversation and then somewhere  
along the trip this kid runs out in front of our car and my dad  
just full on screams “NATURAL SELECTION” scaring both  
me and the kid who heard through open windows and thankfully  
jumped back out of the way

**short fucker [21:38]**

oh my god

**victorious [21:38]**

i actually shat myself  
or my sphincter tightened  
i really can’t tell

**short fucker [21:38]**

can you thank your dad for me that you’re still alive

**victorious [21:41]**

he sounds very disappointed when he said this probably  
means you’re not going to be visiting again any time soon

**short fucker [21:41]**

awwww  
no i’ll come visit as soon as we both have time

**victorious [21:42]**

dad says he can’t wait

**short fucker [21:42]**

i love your family

**victorious [21:42]**

i love yours too

**short fucker [21:42]**

<3

**victorious [21:42]**

<3

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_12th june_ **

**_chat: error_ **

**horse shoe [13:17]**

babes - q  
i have been convinced by an anonymous third party  
that getting my own account on here could be benificial  
to us all - q  
and therefore - q  
i demand you all add me so i can blow up your phones  
and you get to see my beautiful face instead of whatever  
the fuck hoseok has on here - q  
seriously who is this - q

**sugar free [13:18]**

i wouldn’t question it too much if i was you

**whipped™ [13:18]**

kind of need your account name to add you there qiu

**cockjin [13:18]**

are you really going to talk to your future wife like that  
i’m disappointed in you

**whipped™ [13:18]**

gfdi

**horse shoe [13:19]**

justwannaqiu - q  
hmu babes <3 - q

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_15th june_ **

**_chat: new friends_ **

**korean expert [18:55]**

i really don’t get people sometimes

**mtuan93 [18:55]**

please  
join the club

**korean expert [18:55]**

so i’m out right  
and i felt like wearing one of my skirts because i fucking  
want to  
but no  
i have to get these weird looks and several people coming  
up to me and asking to either change or if i could go  
somewhere else with my  
i don’t even remember what they called it

**[18:55]**

but apparently it’s really hard to accept the fact that a man  
can wear a skirt just because he wants to in this day and age

**mtuan93 [18:55]**

I swear  
it’s 2017 and people still can’t fucking understand that we  
can do whatever the fuck we want to do and it shouldn’t  
matter  
men can like pink and make-up and dresses and skirts  
and dolls  
and girls can like cars and science and blue and getting dirty  
and bugs

**korean expert [18:56]**

a-fucking-men  
and people should be able to express themselves in any way  
they see fit  
whether that means that they’re men and women or something  
else  
other people don’t define us

**mtuan93 [18:56]**

to hell they do

**[18:57]**

if I want to wear make-up because I enjoy it and it’s fun to do  
then I can  
I don’t need a reason behind it helen  
not my fault I can do a winged eye better than you can

**korean expert [18:57]**

p r e a c h

**mtuan93 [18:57]**

seriously  
how bitter do you need to be  
which reminds me  
I never gave you my pronouns or asked for yours I just  
assumed off of what jackson said so  
I use he/him

**korean expert [18:58]**

i use he/him too  
and its rlly nice that ur trying to get used to asking instead of  
just assuming  
really appreciate it

**mtuan93 [18:58]**

it’s no problem  
also  
you rock your fucking skirts man  
I bet they look good as fuck on you

**korean expert [18:58]**

and you keep up with your make-up too  
make all the helens jealous of your winged eyes

 

 

 

**_jacksonwang852_ ** **changed** **_mtuan93_ ** **’s name to** **_my first love_ **

**_jacksonwang852_ ** **changed** **_korean expert_ ** **’s name to** **_my second love_ **

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_16th june_ **

**got me like TT [19:27]**

well  
well  
well  
what have me here  
sandy claws, hUH????  
oooooooh i’m really scARED  
so you’re the one everyone’s been talking about  
a hA   
HA   
HAAAAA

**ryan [19:27]**

**** u’re joking  
u’re JOKING  
i can’t believe my eyes  
u’re joking me  
u GOTTA be  
this CAN’T be the right guy  
he’s ancient

**got me like TT [19:28]**

he’s ugly

**ryan [19:28]**

i don’t know which is worse  
i might just split a seam now  
if i don’t die laughing first

**got me like TT [19:28]**

when mister oogie boogie says  
there’s trouble close at hand  
you better pay aTTENTION NOW  
CAUSE IM THE BOOGIE MAN

**ryan [19:28]**

and if u aren’t shaking  
there’s something very wrong  
‘cause this may be the last time  
u hear the boogie song

**got me like TT [19:29]**

wOOOOOHOOO

**ryan [19:29]**

WOOHOOOO

**got me like TT [19:29]**

WOOOOHOOOOO

**ryan [19:29]**

WOOOOHOOOOO

**got me like TT [19:29]**

WO  
HOOOOOOOO

**ryan [19:29]**

WOO   
HOOOOOO

**got me like TT [19:30]**

oooHHHH IM THE OOGIE BOOGIE MAN

**ryan [19:30]**

release me now or u must face the dire consequences  
the children are expecting me so please  
come to ur senses

**got me like TT [19:30]**

hA   
you’re joking!!!!  
you’re joking!  
i can’t believe my ears  
would someone SHUT this fella up  
i’m DROWNING in my tears

**ryan [19:31]**

he’s funny  
i’m LAUGHING  
u really are too much

**got me like TT [19:31]**

and now with your permission  
i’m going to do my stuff

**ryan [19:32]**

what are u going to do

**got me like TT [19:32]**

the very best i can  
woooAOOAOAAAHHHHHH  
THE SOUND OF ROLLING DICE  
IS MUSIC IN THE AIR   
CAUSE IM A GAMBLING BOOGIE MAN   
ALTHOUGH I DONT PLAY FAIR

**ryan [19:33]**

its much more fun  
i must confess  
with LIVES on the line  
not mine of course  
but urs old boy  
now that’d be just fine

**got me like TT [19:34]**

release me fast or you will have to answer for this  
heinous act

**ryan [19:34]**

oh BOTHER  
u’re SOMETHING  
u put me in a SPIN  
u arent comprehending  
the position that you’re in

**got me like TT [19:35]**

it’s hopeless  
you’re finished  
you haven’t got a prayer!!!!  
cause i’m mister oogie boogie  
and you

**ryan [19:35]**

ain’t going

**got me like TT [19:36]**

n o w h e r e  
love you joon-hyung

**ryan [19:36]**

love you too tae

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_20th june_ **

**_chat: this is a mistake_ **

**fucking alpaca [15:37]**

so what do you guys do?

**jung-hope [15:37]**

what do we do?

**fucking alpaca [15:37]**

yeah   
like hobbies and stuff

**jung-hope [15:38]**

oh   
oh well i dance

**cookie_97 [15:38]**

he’s really good

**jung-hope [15:38]**

still can get better though

**minyoongi93 [15:38]**

i rap sometimes

**fucking alpaca [15:39]**

oh that’s so cool   
like to both of you   
you guys must be creative, huh?

**jung-hope [15:39]**

gloss is super good   
like they write mainly in korean but the few   
bits in english they’ve done have been super   
awesome too

**cookie_97 [15:40]**

yoongi also plays basketball

**fucking alpaca [15:42]**

i demand we play together when i come over

**minyoongi93 [15:42]**

sure

**fucking alpaca [15:43]**

what about you, jungkook?

**cookie_97 [15:43]**

yoongi’s teaching me photography tips and hoseok  
is helping me out with dancing so i’m kind of focusing  
on those mainly for the moment

**fucking alpaca [15:45]**

wow  
you all got a lot of cool stuff to do in your free time

**jung-hope [15:46]**

do you not really have many hobbies?

**fucking alpaca [15:46]**

have a few but none of them are as interesting  
as yours honestly  
w here’s seokjin anyway?

**cookie_97 [15:47]**

well   
he’s i mean i overreacting right now

**jung-hope [15:47]**

uh-oh

**fucking alpaca [15:48]**

uh-oh?

**minyoongi93 [15:48]**

what did you do

**cookie_97 [15:48]**

what makes you think i did anything?

**minyoongi93 [15:49]**

whenever you say jin is overreacting it means you   
died something to piss him off

**jung-hope [15:49]**

i have yet to see a day where this isn’t true

**cookie_97 [15:50]**

oh ffs

**kimseokjin_1992 [15:52]**

i am not overreacting fuck you

**fucking alpaca [15:52]**

uh

**jung-hope [15:52]**

:o

**cookie_97 [15:53]**

hyung i already said i was sorry   
what else do you want me to say?

**kimseokjin_1992 [15:53]**

oh i don’t know   
maybe not give me a heart attack when you pretend   
to jump onto the tube tracks just as the tube’s a   
minute away?   
that’d be nice, actually

**fucking alpaca [15:54]**

what the fuck

**jung-hope [15:54]**

jeongguk what the fuck

**cookie_97 [15:54]**

it was a joke!  
i wasn’t going to actually jump onto the tracks

**jung-hope [15:55]**

what part of that even sounded like a good idea?

**cookie_97 [15:55]**

i was bored and there weren’t many people around   
alright   
i thought it’d help pass the time

**kimseokjin_1992 [15:56]**

pass the time by killing me stone dead   
what the fuck were you thinking?

**cookie_97 [15:56]**

i SAID it was a JOKE   
why does nobody believe me?

**minyoongi93 [15:57]**

jeon jungkook   
you and i are going to have a conversation in   
person in ten   
do you understand?

**fucking alpaca [15:58]**

what is happening

**minyoongi93 [15:58]**

jeon jungkook, do i need to repeat myself?

**cookie_97 [15:59]**

no, hyung

**minyoongi93 [15:59]**

you’ve already lost two minutes   
be quick

**jung-hope [16:00]**

run like the fucking wind, jungkook

**_jung-hope_ ** **changed** **_cookie_97_ ** **’s name to** **_fuck up_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i made a [vhope + junghope bingo](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/vjhbingo/profile) if anyone is interested!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is a little shorter than usual bc it's filler kinda?? but next chapter, things will be put in motion and future plot points will be made possible so i hope it's not too much of a bother!!

**_23rd june_ **

**_chat: this is a mistake_ **

**kimseokjin_1992 [18:39]**

do you know what i don’t get

**fuck up [18:40]**

what?

**fuck up [18:43]**

oh come on

**jung-hope [18:45]**

what don’t you get, appreciated friend seokjin?

**fuck up [18:45]**

seriously

**kimseokjin_1992 [18:45]**

who in god’s name thought that giving a metal saucepan  
a metal handle was a good fucking idea

**fuck up [18:46]**

for fucksake

**jung-hope [18:47]**

you found a metal saucepan with a metal handle

**kimseokjin_1992 [18:47]**

you know  
when i cook i don’t really want to feel the same burning  
sensation my food does  
i’d rather have my hand intact than covered in third degree  
burns

**jung-hope [18:48]**

quite a sensible choice in my opinion

**fucking alpaca [18:56]**

who the fuck would buy a metal saucepan with a metal  
handle 

**kimseokjin_1992 [18:56]**

thank you!!!!!  
it doesn’t make any fucking sense because you need to  
grab a teatowel to grab the fucking handle  
which just adds the possibility of dropping your saucepan and  
food everywhere

**[18:57]**

i could burn my foot just because some arsehole doesn’t  
understand chemistry

**fucking alpaca [18:57]**

please don’t burn your feet  
they’re very important in the whole walking business

**jung-hope [18:58]**  
why are you speaking as if from experience jin

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:01]**

my sister may not make the best purchases

**jung-hope [17:01]**

i pray for your sister

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:01]**

me too

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_26th june*_ **

**국이 [22:08]**

형

**진이형 [22:16]**

sorry i can’t hang out today my mum says no

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_27th june_ **

**_chat: new friends_ **

**my first love [11:50]**

I’m worried

**jacksonwang852 [11:50]**

why are you worried

**my first love [11:50]**

why are you up

**jacksonwang852 [11:51]**

not important

**my first love [11:56]**

I’m just worried about moving to a new country  
again

**jacksongwang852 [11:57]**

and it’s valid to be thinking about it a lot  
you don’t have to feel weird for that

**my second love [11:57]**

ur moving to a new country?

**my first love [11:58]**

yeah I’m going to study in england for a few years

**my second love [11:58]**

oh wow that’s cool  
i hope you enjoy ur course

**my first love [11:58]**

thank you  
but I’m starting to regret things, honestly  
what if this wasn’t a good decision

j **acksonwang852 [11:59]**

we’ve talked about this mark  
and we’ve had like  
four huge calls over it where we both did so much  
research into each of the unis that offered you a place  
and we both agreed that the uk offered you the most  
this isn’t a mistake

**my second love [11:59]**

is it the whole moving to a new country that’s scary?

**my first love [12:02]**

partially?  
I’m just nervous all over for so many things  
I really just want to know if this is the right move for me  
if future me will be happy I did this  
if this isn’t the wrong path

**jacksonwang852 [12:03]**

well  
you can’t really know what is right or wrong in the longrun  
bc we just can’t see the future and how things turn out

**my second love [12:03]**

i dropped out of a uni course in my final year  
seemed like a bad decision at the time  
esp since my parents couldn’t see why i wanted to  
and went off on one every time they saw me for  
two months after

**my first love [12:04]**

wow

**my second love [12:04]**

and i lost a lot of respect from friends, too  
but in the long run  
as in now  
it was completely worth it  
bc im doing exactly what i want to do, enjoying  
it and have a huge following for it

**jacksonwang852 [12:05]**

and sometimes it won’t work out  
and you’ll have wished that you hadn’t done whatever  
it was that you did  
but you learn from that and you move on and you become  
better  
becasue that’s hwo life works

**my first love [12:06]**

I know you’re both right  
but I still feel nervous

**my second love [12:06]**

and that’s fine

**jacksonwang852 [12:07]**

no-one expects you to suddenly be okay and feel like  
you can conquer the world

**my first love [12:07]**

thanks  
venting always makes me feel better

**jacksonwang852 [12:07]**

i’m always behind you markiepooh

**my second love [12:07]**

np mark

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_2nd july_ **

**국이 [13:31]**

형이

**진이형 [14:00]**

can’t talk right now  
too busy doing nothing all by myself  
can’t cancel

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_8th july_ **

**got me like TT [14:48]**

my cousin’s sugar mommy is sending me  
photos of her cat via facebook messenger

**ryan [15:02]**

u know  
messages for u always surprise me nowadays  
and today is no exception

**got me like TT [15:03]**

it’s a very cute cat  
she’s had it for five years now  
it’s name is tank

**ryan [15:03]**

tank?

**got me like TT [15:04]**

it’s huge and fluffy and weighs a lot

**ryan [15:04]**

it’s a cute name for a cat

**got me like TT [15:05]**

i’m confused as to why she’s sending me pictures  
of her cat when i know she has a dog  
and i’m a dog person

**ryan [15:05]**

could ur cousin have been lying

**got me like TT [15:05]**

why would someone lie about that though

**ryan [15:05]**

if ur cousin is anything like u i wouldnt question  
them

**got me like TT [15:06]**

i don’t know whether to feel offended or complimented

**ryan [15:06]**

i’d say go for the last one

**got me like TT [15:12]**

… hey hyung

**ryan [15:17]**

yeah?

**got me like TT [15:17]**

you’re out, right?

**ryan [15:26]**

out?

**got me like TT [15:26]**

like  
presenting as male and everything

**ryan [15:32]**

i am  
why?

**got me like TT [15:32]**

i was talking to my best friend earlier and i mentioned  
you and how we used to be neighbours and a wrong  
number actually led to something good  
and i wasn’t sure if i could use he/him pronouns for you  
or not

**[15:33]**

and it’s been bugging me  
so i thought what better way to find out than to just outright  
ask you

**ryan [15:37]**

u can use he/him to talk about me with people yeah  
thanks a lot for asking  
it means a lot

**got me like TT [15:38]**

it’s no problem hyung  
i’m just being a decent human being  
you don’t need to thank me for that

**ryan [15:41]**

i want to anyway

**got me like TT [15:42]**

in that case you’re welcome hyung

**ryan [15:42]**

<3

**got me like TT [15:43]**

<3

 

 

 

 

 **call with** **_sock “kim” jean_ ** **has ended! {01:26:09}**

**lil cock [14:08]**

I can’t stop laughin goh my god

**sock “kim” jean [14:08]**

I MADE A MISTAKE OKAY  
PLEASE STOP LAUGHINT AT ME

**lil cock [14:09]**

I can’t fuckinf believe you og my od  
my sister is lookin at me funny pls elp

**sock “kim” jean [14:09]**

SHT UP I DIDNT DO ANYTHING  
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU ANYMORE

**lil cock [14:09]**

my sister just came over and asked why I’m  
trying to give myself a hernia fuckin shit

**sock “kim” jean [14:10]**

im sorry i don’t know you i don’t think we’ve  
met before

**l** **il cock [14:10]**

no if we’re playing this you need to introduce yourself  
as the guy who tells you to shut the fuck up instead o bless  
you when you sneeze

**sock “kim” jean [14:11]**

it was AN ACCIDENT OKAY  
I DIDN’T MEAN TO

**lil cock [14:11]**

HOW WAS THAT AN ACCIDENT?  
THEY DON’T EVEN SOUND REMOTELY ALIKE

**sock “kim” jean [14:12]**

THIS IS WHY I HUNG UP ON YOU  
GOODBYE I’M GOING TO DO NOTHING ALONE  
FOR THE REST OF THE EVENING

**lil cock [14:12]**

SEOKJIN WAIT

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**_11th july_ **

**_chat: this is a mistake_ **

**jung-hope [17:19]**  
a bitch trying to tell me i don’t look good in glasses  
a bitch obviously needs glasses the fuck

i look stunning get the fuck out of here

**fucking alpaca [17:20]**

oh wow those glasses suit you so well

**minyoongi93 [17:22]**

would you look at that  
my knees are weak  
damn seok warn a person next time

**jung-hope [17:23]**

how about no

**minyoongi93 [17:23]**

put that tongue back where it came from or so  
help me

 **_kimseokjin_1992_ ** **changed** **_minyoongie93_ ** **’s name to** **_in love_ **

**fucking alpaca [17:23]**

so I’m guessing it’s safe to assume this is flirting

**kimseokjin_1992 [17:24]**

this is indeed the dance we often see back and forth between  
the two specimens that live by the names of  
min yoongi and jung hoseok  
the burning question of whether they will ever kiss and hold hands  
something no-one can confirm or deny

**in love [14:25]**

istg jin  
don’t make me play this game with you

**kimseokjin_1992 [14:25]**

i have no idea what you’re talkin about

 **_in love_ ** **has changed** **_kimseokjin_1992_ ** **’s name to** **_the absolute weakest_ **

**the absolute weakest [14:25]**

really

**[14:26]**

is that the best you can do

**in love [14:26]**

don’t you push me woman

**fucking alpaca [14:26]**

notice how yoongi has failed to deny the accusation

**the absolute weakest [14:26]**

ah yes  
please  
join the commentating sport upon the yoonseok interaction

**fucking alpaca [14:27]**

yoonseok?

**the absolute weakest [14:27]**

YOONgi + hoSEOK  
yoonseok

**fucking alpaca [14:27]**

have I really made friends with someone who meshes  
names together

**jung-hope [14:27]**

welcome to my world

**in love [14:27]**

excuse me  
but who came up with the shipname?

**jung-hope [14:28]**

uh

**in love [14:28]**

and who was begging for a ship name to be made  
just last night?

**the absolute weakest [14:28]**

hoseok quick  
send another selfie  
it’ll shut em up

**in love [14:28]**

lies  
all lies and slancer

**jung-hope [14:29]**

**the absolute weakest [14:42]**

haHA

 

 

 

 

**국이 [04:12]**

seokjinnie-hyung  
i know i fucked up and i really scared you when  
i made that stupid joke about falling onto the  
train tracks  
and i don’t know what to tell you and i don’t  
expect you to want an excuse or a reason  
behind it  
but it’s been [x time] now and i really miss  
talking to you and hanging out with you  
i’m so sorry i scared you like that it was  
very dumb of me and i shouldn’t have done  
it

**[04:13]**

not in front of you, or anyone

**국이 [04:27]**

i hope you can forgive me  
especially after what you’ve gone through i  
know it was a really stupid thing to do and you  
have every right to be mad at me  
just  
please

**[04:28]**

please talk to me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *국이 = kookie in hangul  
> 진이형 = jinnie-hyung in hangul  
> 형/형이 = hyung/hyungie in hangul

**Author's Note:**

> two of the things mentioned are true stories that happened to me... i am both rapmon with the straw and mark suffering from a friend thinking briefly mice didn't have ears.
> 
> so how was your day??


End file.
